The Wharf
by MandyLeigh87
Summary: Bella moves to the East Coast when she inherits a house and lands a job at the local fishermen's bar. There she discovers the sea is just as unpredictable as the young lobstermen she falls for. Rated M. BxE mini fic
1. Prologue

You're gone.

I felt myself drifting away with each step I took, ascending towards the top. He would hate me for this. Hate me for everything that happened and for what I was about to do. I was sorry. I couldn't even begin to tell him how sorry I was. I lost...everything. And he didn't even know it yet.

He wouldn't know until after I was gone, after my body had been taken out to sea. The doctors would tell him, I was sure. Everyone would speculate why and they would all probably be right. I'd wanted this so bad and now it had slipped through my fingers. Nothing was enough now, I regretted to say not even he was enough. There was always going to be something missing, a void in the very pit of my chest. It could only be filled by you.

The sea breeze was cold as I stepped out onto the main gallery. I tasted the salt, breathed it in. My nightgown whipped back and forth against my body, wrestling with the wind.

I reached for the railing and looked over. The water was rough tonight, crashing violently against the rocks below me. I wondered for a moment if it would hurt to hit them or if it would be over too quickly for me to feel anything.

My fingers didn't shake as I gripped the railing and hoisted myself up onto it. The light above me whirred around, casting its glow out over the sea. I knew he was out there somewhere and for a moment I regretted leaving him now. I loved him. I hated myself more. I blamed myself for your loss and I'm nothing now. I hoped to God that he would forgive me.

I leaned out over the edge, holding on by the very tips of my fingers. I counted to three and then I let go.

"Please...please forgive me."

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><p><strong>AN: No your eyes are not playing tricks on you. Yes I'm semi bad at a retirement that I'm not even officially into yet. No this is not a brand new full length story. Since I enjoyed doing a mini fic with DMW, I'm doing another with a long, unfinished one shot that I'd been dying to do more with. So here it is. **

**This prologue is from an anon POV, but you will eventually find out who it is and what the fook is going on. The story is not finished yet, so I don't know how many chapters it will be. They will be short, not drabble short, but short. Once I'm finished with the whole story I'll post fairly frequently (I posted usually once a day with DMW) and finish it rather quickly after it gets going. I've realized I kind of like posting that way. You don't have too wait long, I don't have to have anxiety attacks about getting updates out. Capiche?**

**Thanks for joining me for another short, but hopefully good ride. Hopefully this will get started (and ended) in the next couple of weeks. Some chapters will be more in depth, some will not. They're that way for a reason. I honestly don't have time to make this a lengthy, full length fic, but I still want to share it with you so take it or leave it.  
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**This fic obviously touches on the subject of suicide. It's not something that's discussed at great length but is a vital part of one character's story. If you're not comfortable with that please don't read. Please don't come yelling at me that you're offended later on. I warned you. **

**Find me on Twitter: MandyLeigh010**

**Find me on FB: MandyLeigh Fanfic**

**Tootles.**


	2. Chapter 2

**The remaining chapters will be told through Bella's POV. Disclaimer for all chapters: I don't own Twilight.**

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><p>"Yeah Dad. I'm sure I'm fine." I practically laughed into the phone. It was the fifth time he'd called since he left this morning.<p>

"Well I'm sorry if I'm bugging you, Bella, but when your only daughter moves to the other side of the country by herself you get a little anxious."

"Dad. Relax. I'm perfectly capable of taking care of myself."

"I know you are, sweetie. Hey I've gotta go I think they're starting to board my flight. I'll call you later."

"I'm actually going to go out and look for a job I think so I might not answer."

"Okay bye, Bells."

"Bye."

I hung up the phone and sighed. I never imagined that I'd be living in small-town Maine, but when you inherit an almost beautiful New England house you can't just let it go. Besides, I was looking for a fresh start somewhere. Life in Forks was just plain boring. This would be new and different.

A large crash from outside made me jump.

"What the hell is it now?" I got up and started towards the window. One of the shutters was lying broken on the grass. This house was absolutely stunning, but it needed a lot of work. My mom and her husband Phil had bought it on a whim and never really got the chance to do what they wanted with it before the accident. I had no idea if I was even capable of fixing everything on my own but I guess I'd have to.

I grabbed my toolbox that Charlie had left for me and went outside. It was a little chilly out, but the leaves were absolutely beautiful. Each tree was a canvas of orange, red and yellow. It was a stark change from the allover green I was used to back in Washington.

I looked back at the house. It was a two-story beauty with a wrap around porch and a balcony of some sorts up on the top. I still didn't know what it was for or how to get to it, but I bet it would be a great spot to watch the sunset over the water.

I picked up the shutter from the ground and held it up to the window. I reached for the hammer with my other hand, but the shutter fell to the ground again and crashed right onto my foot.

"Damn it!" I dropped the hammer and grabbed for my foot. I could just add this to my other injuries I've already accumulated from this damn house. I'd hit my head at least twice on the light fixture hanging from the dining room ceiling. I've tripped and fallen over a warped floorboard in the entryway. And I've pinched my finger trying to fix the faucet in the bathroom. This house was quickly becoming the death of me.

I immediately gave up on the shutter and sat down on the porch swing, wrapping my sweater around me and swaying lightly. I could see the lighthouse around the trees, sitting on its own little island of jagged rocks out a few hundred yards in the water. I sat for a few minutes swinging slowly back and forth, contemplating whether I'd made a mistake coming out here. I didn't know what it was, but something was drawing me here. Almost like gravity. Maybe it made me feel closer to my mom, I didn't know.

My parents divorced not too long after I was born and I lived with my mom for the most part growing up in Phoenix. She was always a little fidgety about staying in one place too long and to be completely honest I got sick of moving from town to town. I think she saw that too so she sent me to live with my dad in Washington. She and Phil sold our house and lived out of an RV most of the time just traveling around the country. Even though I would have hated it, I almost envied her in some ways for being able to be that free. I'd never known that feeling. Maybe I was just too tightly wound, more like my dad.

We got the call almost a year ago in the middle of the night. I remember Charlie coming into my room and just sitting on the end of my bed with his head in his hands. Even though they weren't together anymore, I knew that he still loved Mom. And she loved him in her own way. They just didn't work together, almost like repelling magnets.

I had known something was wrong when he didn't say anything, but I was too scared to know what it was. So I pretended I was still sleeping, exaggerating my breathing so he wouldn't know. I'd finally felt him place his hand on my back and gently shake me awake.

"Bella, honey wake up."

"Dad, what is it?" I didn't move at all I was gripping the covers too tightly to do anything.

He was silent for a long time. I don't think he knew what to say. How did you tell your daughter that her mother was dead?

"Baby, that was the police department from Maine. There's been an accident."

I shut my eyes tightly and tried to shake the words away, thinking about the last time I'd spoken to my mother.

"Bella, I'm so excited we're driving up the New England coast today. Maybe even stopping in Boston. Phil wants to see Fenway." I could almost hear her smiling through the phone.

"They're dead aren't they?" I could barely get the words out, even though I knew they were true.

"I'm sorry sweetheart. The truck driver had been driving all night and he fell asleep at the wheel."

I cried silently for a few moments before the sobs started hurling out of my chest. Charlie did his best to hold in his tears as he curled up next to me and put his arms around me.

My mom wasn't someone who had a lot of material things, but she never ceased to amaze me. I was a little more than surprised when her attorney called to schedule the reading of her will that I had no idea she even had.

There wasn't much. A few pieces of jewelry, family heirlooms, some stocks and bonds…and a house. They'd only bought it a week before it happened. I guess she'd finally found a place that felt like home. Maybe that's part of the reason I wanted to come here. It was someplace that had given her happiness; it was a piece of her. Maybe I was just grasping for any bit of her that was left.

The creak of the porch swing knocked me out of my thoughts. Before I could jump off of it, it crashed to the ground.

"Ouch!" I picked myself up and stomped back into the house. I had to get out of here or it was going to drive me crazy. I guess I could start the job search early.

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><p><strong>Thanks for reading. I do not call this necessarily a drabble fic, more like a mini fic. Each chapter will be around a thousand words, give or take. I plan on posting at least one chapter a day, but I reserve the right to change that if need be. The whole story is almost complete so hopefully the only changes would be to do multiple postings on any given day. <strong>

**This fic was partially inspired by the song "Brandy" by Looking Glass.  
><strong>

**I'm hoping to post one more chapter tonight so you can meet Edward ; ) **

**There is a wonderful banner for this story made by ChristaG_Banner. I'll post a link on my profile page so you can see her beautiful work!**

**I hope you'll visit my profile to see what else I have going on and check out my other stories if you haven't yet. I look forward to hearing your thoughts on Bella's new beginning.**


	3. Chapter 3

I pulled on some Levi jeans, a long sleeve t-shirt, and a vest before venturing back outside. My old rusty truck lay dormant in the driveway. To be honest I was surprised it had lasted the whole way here. My dad was pretty hesitant to drive it across the country, but I had faith in her. I turned the ignition and I was off into town.

It was a short five-minute drive to downtown. I parked my car and started down the street, planning to stop anyplace and anywhere I could. Restoring that old house was going to take a lot of money. Being an unemployed college graduate doesn't really bring in the bacon.

After being rejected by seven different places I was beyond frustrated. Apparently I needed more experience to be a waitress, or a grocery store clerk, or a secretary. How the hell was I supposed to get any experience if nobody would hire me?

I decided to take a stroll down by the docks to blow off some steam. I sat down on one of the benches and watched the fishing boats come in to dock. Maybe it was a mistake coming here. Maybe my dad was right. I couldn't wait to see the look on his face when I came crawling back to Forks, a complete and utter failure.

The voices behind me distracted me from my self-pity for a moment.

"So I guess Mom fired that new bartender…"

I spun around, suddenly intrigued by their conversation. There were two young guys standing on the boat behind me, packing up some type of equipment. One was fairly large, muscles bulging out from underneath his dirty white shirt. The other looked pretty rough. Scruffy beard, desperately in need of a haircut. His bronze mop of hair fell into his eyes as he bent down to pick up a lobster cage.

"Well that doesn't surprise me. She was a complete ditz. Probably couldn't even tie her own shoes," the scruffy one said. I was instantly mesmerized by the sound of his voice. It was smooth like velvet, which was a completely surprising contrast to his appearance. I didn't think I would ever get used to that thick New England accent everyone had around here.

"It doesn't take a genius to work at the Wharf, so she must have been pretty bad. I mean Mom's tough, but I thought she'd last longer than that," the other one said.

The Wharf? That sounded familiar. I was pretty sure it was just down the boardwalk here, a bar where all of the fishermen hang out. If a girl just got fired from there then they must be hiring. Right?

I got up from the bench and started to walk. I chanced a glance towards the two men again. The man with the velvet voice was staring at me. We connected eyes for a moment before I blushed and looked away, completely embarrassed that he'd caught me looking at him. I caught a quick glimpse of his sideways smile. He was actually kind of cute behind that complicated mess on his face.

I hurried down the boardwalk and stopped when I saw the neon sign. The Wharf. I smiled when I saw the "Help Wanted" sign in the window. The door creaked as I pushed it open and peeked my head inside.

"You're a little early for Happy Hour sweetie…"

I turned towards the voice. There was a woman who looked like she had no business in a place as rough as this standing behind the bar wiping down some glasses.

"Actually I was inquiring about the job…" I gestured to the sign on the door.

"You have any experience?" She set down the glass and grabbed a large crate.

"Um. Not really."

"Then I'm not interested." She started towards the back.

"Please. I just moved here, I really, really need this job. I'm a hard worker I promise."

She stopped in the doorway and spun around. I tugged at my shirt as her eyes raked over me, assessing whether I was worth the risk or not. I prayed that I was because this was my last shot.

"You start in two hours. Go home and change out of that Gap advertisement and come back." She disappeared into the hallway.

It took me a few seconds to realize that she just hired me, but when I did I couldn't stop the ear-to-ear grin that spread across my face. I started jumping up and down in excitement.

"What's your name anyway?" The woman called.

"Oh I'm Bella. Bella Swan. I just moved here from Washington and I've been all ov-"

"I just wanted a name dear, not your life story." She came back out into the bar. "I'm Esme and I run the place. And I swear if I see another sweater vest in my bar I'll throw you out myself."

"Okay gotcha…" I started towards the door. "I'll see you soon." I pushed the door open and stumbled on the small step. I looked back just in time to see Esme crack a smile and laugh to herself. Behind that hard exterior she seemed like a very warm person. She kind of reminded me of my mom.

I ran home and took a shower…a cold one at that, and fumbled through my closet. I never thought it before, but now that it's been pointed out to me I kind of dressed like a pompous ass. I pulled on some ratty jeans and one of Charlie's old concert t-shirts that he'd accidentally left here. I gasped when I looked at the clock. I only had a half hour until I had to be at the bar and it probably wasn't a good idea to be late on the first day. I guess blow-drying my hair was out of the question. I ran a comb through it, grabbed my bag and headed out the door.

"If you woulda showed up five minutes later, you'd be calling this your former place of employment…" Esme said as I walked through the door. There were a few people crowded around the bar, but it wasn't busy by any means. Two old men in the corner watched me walk across the room and back behind the bar. "Okay so uh…quick bartending tutorial." She grabbed a few bottles. "We don't get too many fancy orders in here so I'll just give you the basics." I pulled a pen and paper out of my back pocket and prepared to take notes. She started pouring different mixes of drinks and passing them out to the few people surrounding the bar.

"Okay and how much rum was in that?" I asked.

"No clue," Esme said with a laugh. "Sweetheart, odds are that most of the people here are already drunk or off their rocker, they aren't going to give two shits about you being exact with your measurements. I only use four types of measurements." She held up her fingers. "A smidge, a little, some, and a helluva lot."

"Okay I think I've got it." I threw the piece of paper away and tucked my hair behind my ear.

"Hey sugar can I get a beer?" A man behind me said.

"Now that I can do." I spun across the bar and grabbed him a bottle, cracking it open and sliding it to him in one swift motion.

"See…" Esme said. "You're a natural."

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><p><strong>Confession: I think Esme is my favorite character in this story. So Bells found herself a job. How long will it take before she runs into the men who sent her there? ;)<strong>

**Thanks so much for reading and following me on this adventure filled with lots of semen...I mean seamen. Men of the sea.**

**Probably the last update for tonight. Don't want to get ahead of myself and make you guys wait for the last few chapters I'm working on now. **

**Again, follow me on twitter MandyLeigh010 or FB MandyLeigh Fanfic. I hope you took a moment to check out the banner link on my profile. It's so pretteh : )**


	4. Chapter 4

A half hour later I was thankful that I was a natural because it was really busy and Esme and I were the only ones here. She kept going on and on about a girl named Alice and that she better get her ass over here before she gets fired.

"Bella, can you run in the back and do another beer run, we're getting low." She shook some empty bottles at me and I started towards the back. The crates were heavy as hell but I managed to make it back up the stairs from the storage room. I stopped when I reached the doorway and rested the crate on my hip. I recognized the burly guy from the boat earlier, but he had definitely cleaned up a little. He was sitting at the bar with a blond guy about the same age as him, chatting away with a tiny dark haired girl.

"Boys, where's Edward?" Esme said.

"He'll be here soon, Mom. He was just cleaning himself up. We know he's your favorite, but you could at least be a little bit more excited to see us." The man from the boat joked.

"Oh you know I love all of my boys." She rounded the bar and wrapped her arms around both of the boys. I took a deep breath and walked out into the crowd.

"Bella, I'd like you to meet my boys," Esme said. "This is Emmett and Jasper." She placed a kiss on both of their cheeks, much to their disgust.

"I'm Alice!" The girl standing with Jasper spun around and pranced towards me. "Esme tells me you're the newbie."

"That's me." I smiled and shrugged my shoulders.

"I can tell already. We're going to be best friends. I just have a feeling about things." She smiled and I was relieved. I could use a few friends right now.

I bent down and started putting the beer bottles in the cooler. I didn't even hear the door swing open over the loud background noise.

"There's my Edward!" I heard Esme clap her hands in delight. "Bella!"

I stood up and brushed my hands off.

"Bella, this is my son Edward." I looked up and blinked several times. The man who stood before me was…beyond beautiful. I almost felt like apologizing just for looking at him. But there was something about him. Something almost familiar in his stare. I just couldn't put my finger on it.

"Hello Bella…" Edward's smooth velvet voice said. I dropped the bottle I was holding and it crashed into pieces on the floor. It was the man from the boat. Scruffy. He wasn't so scruffy anymore. He tried to hold in his laughter as I stared down at the mess at my feet.

"I'm…I'm sorry Esme, let me clean this up." I pulled a rag from the counter and started cleaning up the broken bottle and mopping up the beer.

"That's the first one you've broken all night kid, you're already way ahead of the others."

The three boys took a booth in the back and Alice and I went back to work. It died down after an hour or so. A lot of the groups were almost passed out in their stools so we started working on cleaning the dirty glasses.

"So how do you know them?" I nodded towards the boys.

"I'm engaged to Jasper."

"Oh! That's great, when's the wedding?"

"We're not sure yet. We're kind of just saving up for an actual engagement ring right now. Fishing doesn't always bring in a lot of money so we get by with what we have. Esme owns the entire building you know. We all live in upstairs. There's four apartments up there. Jasper and I are in one, Esme and the Captain in one, Edward has his own and Emmett, and I guess Jake when he stays there are in the last one."

"Jake?"

"Emmett's son with Rose. They're divorced. The job just got to be too much for her." She finished drying her last glass. "I mean I won't lie it's hard. The boys can be gone for weeks at a time. And don't even get me started on the storms. I practically chew all of my nails off every time I hear a weather forecast with the words high seas or gale force winds."

I guess I never really thought about how hard it must be for them, everyone who has to sit here and just wait for them to come back. It's almost devastating. I can understand how that could take a toll on a relationship.

"But once you see them out on the water you understand it…" Alice continued. "There's nothing like seeing a fisherman out on the sea. I mean Jasper's face just lights up like he's at his own personal DisneyWorld. Us landlovers can't even begin to understand the relationship they have with the ocean. It's unbreakable and permanent. Something that's always a part of them." She looked lovingly at Jasper. "And sometimes you just have to accept that along with everything else. And I guess I don't mind being second to the waves."

"Okay everyone clear out. We're closing up shop!" Esme called. She started shooing everyone out the door, granting a few grumbles and stumbles from the customers. She closed the door behind them and turned the sign off outside. "Girls, I'm exhausted do you mind closing up?"

"No go ahead," Alice smiled. Esme headed towards the back.

"By the way, Bella. You did a great job tonight." She smiled and threw something at me. I reached up and caught the wad of cash. Alice grabbed a mop and sauntered over to the jukebox. My eyes grew wide as I started counting the money. "Uh Alice this is too much. Don't you get some too?"

"I already got mine. That's your share." She maintained eye contact with Jasper while she started mopping the floor. The boys were still talking quietly in the corner booth. I stole a few glances at Edward. His long fingers gripped his mug of beer, occasionally running around the rim or down the side.

"Well I've got to get going," Emmett said. "I've got the kid tomorrow and Rose will kill me if I pick him up looking like shit." He smiled at me before leaving. Jasper got up and went to stand behind Alice, who was swaying to the music as she mopped. Jasper grabbed her hips and pulled her closer to him. I almost felt like I should look away, like it was too intimate, but I couldn't. He bent down and whispered something in her ear before planting a soft kiss on her neck. She smiled warmly at his touch. He whispered something else in her ear before darting over to Edward.

They spoke for a few minutes before Jasper actually got down on his knees on this disgusting floor and pleaded with him to do something. Edward's eyes flickered to mine before he nodded his head. Jasper laughed, thanked him immensely, and started back towards Alice. He scooped her up, causing her to drop her mop to the floor and started running out the door.

"Thanks Edward, we owe you! Goodnight, Bella!" Alice called as she was being whisked away. I waved and went back to wiping the counter, consciously aware of Edward's eyes on me. He stood up from the booth and grabbed an extra towel off the bar, slinging it over his shoulder and walking towards the mop lying on the floor.

"I saw you at the dock earlier…" He mumbled as he started mopping.

I guess I wasn't surprised that he recognized me. "Yeah," I stuttered. "Sorry, I didn't mean to stare."

"It's okay, I'm used to it. I probably looked like I had an animal nesting on my face. Weeks at sea will do that to you," he laughed

"So what was that all about?" I nodded towards where Alice and Jasper had just disappeared to and tried to make small talk. The only noise was the music in the background and even that wasn't enough to take away the awkward tension between us.

"Alice and Jasper have been away from each other for three weeks. They needed some...alone time." He laughed to himself. "So I guess you get me instead of her for tonight."

"Oh…Oh!" I gasped when I suddenly realized what he'd meant.

"So Mom said you just moved here?"

"Um. Yeah. From Washington."

"Seattle?"

"Forks." I shrugged.

"Hmmm…Never heard of it."

I laughed. "That doesn't surprise me. Most people haven't."

He smiled and kept mopping. "So what brought you all the way out here?"

I gulped hard. Was this too much for a first conversation? I decided to try and keep it simple.

"I inherited a house."

"A house? Probably from some crazy uncle you never knew you had right?" He joked.

I stopped wiping the table and took a deep breath. "No it was from my mom." _So much for keeping it simple._

He stopped mopping and looked down at the floor. "Fuck, I'm sorry. Shit. I'm sorry I said that, that was so stupid." He shook his head and then looked up at me, his eyes filled with regret.

"It's okay, really." I smiled at him, trying to ease the tension.

We finished cleaning up in silence. I smiled in thanks and picked up my bag to leave.

"Hey…do you…want to have a beer with me?" Edward said.

I glanced at my watch. It was late. Really late. But I hadn't quite adjusted to the time change yet so I wasn't even remotely tired, even with the exhausting day I'd had.

"Sure." I spun around and started back towards him. "Why not?" I smiled and took a seat at the bar. He reached down and grabbed us each a bottle.

"So how are you liking the house so far?"

I laughed. "Well it's great when it's not falling apart."

"Yeah some of the houses around here are pretty old."

"Pretty old doesn't even begin to cover it. I wouldn't be surprised if it gets condemned for being uninhabitable."

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><p><strong>AN: Her house is pretty uninhabitable. I wonder what we're gonna do about that? ; )**

**So what did you think of their first real meeting? Thanks for reading and thanks for all of your reviews!**

**I'm not sure if I'll be able to post another tonight, but this chapter was longer than the others so I hope you'll survive if I can't. Have a great day!**


	5. Chapter 5

I'd started to fall into step with everything at the bar and found myself actually liking the work. I'd been there a little over a week and I'd been making pretty decent money. Enough to get started on some repairs for the house at least.

The bar was busy from the moment I'd stepped inside tonight. We were going through bottles of beer almost like we were handing them out for free. I'd been so busy bustling around that I hadn't even seen Edward yet. I'd heard Alice say he was here.

When I had a few minutes to breathe, I headed back to the bathroom because my bladder was on the verge of disaster. I pulled my hair up off of my neck as I rounded the corner and almost ran right into someone. He adjusted the case of beer he was holding on his shoulder.

"Whoa!" Edward said. "Sorry." He smiled when he saw it was me.

"It's okay I wasn't paying attention." I cleared my throat when I realized how close we were. "These hallways are a little…small." I leaned back against the wall.

"Pretty busy out there tonight huh?"

"Yeah." I took a deep breath.

"You're doing pretty well though. Are you sure you were never a bartender? Maybe in a past life?" He narrowed his eyes at me.

"Nope. I swear." I held my hands up in defense. "I must just be naturally talented."

"I don't doubt it." His eyes lingered on mine and I almost had to look away. They were so beautiful, almost like that ocean he loved so much. Deep. Dark. Mysterious.

"Captivating…" I whispered.

"What?" He asked, his brow furrowing in confusion.

"Nothing," I squeaked. "I have to uh…" I nodded to the bathroom and told myself to stop speaking. "I'll see ya." I ducked into the bathroom and closed the door tightly behind me.

I wanted to hide in that bathroom forever, but I knew I couldn't. As soon as I took care of business, I washed my hands and headed back out to the bar. Edward was thankfully nowhere to be seen. It wasn't that I didn't want to see him. I just felt nauseous from my word vomit earlier and I didn't think I could face him.

I tried to keep myself busy for the rest of the night and the customers made sure that I stuck to it. I noticed Edward sitting in the corner booth with Emmett and Jasper. They'd alternate bringing us more beer whenever we started getting low, but for the most part they kept to themselves.

A small group of guys stomped into the bar and took one of the tables in the front. I took a deep breath and walked over to get their order. I'd noticed that most people came right up to the bar to get their drinks, but we'd occasionally get people that wanted to be waited on.

I could tell they'd already had a few drinks from their loud, boisterous laughter. I put a smile on my face and stepped up to their table.

"Hey guys, what can I get you?" I asked.

"Hi sugar, what's your name?" One of them asked.

"Bella," I said, trying to placate him. "Are you guys getting a drink or do you just plan on sitting here all night?" I played it off like I was teasing, but they were already starting to get on my nerves.

"Well if I get to watch you work all night Bella, I might do just that." The one who spoke before snickered. I sighed and turned away since they weren't cooperating. I had other things to do.

I froze when I felt one of them slap at my ass. "Motherfucker," I mumbled under my breath. I spun around on my heel and was about to lash into them when I felt someone place their hand on the small of my back.

"Gentlemen, how about we show the lady a little respect huh?" Edward said, flashing a warning smile. It was far from friendly.

"Cullen." The one who'd spoken earlier nodded to Edward.

"What can I get you guys to drink?" Edward asked.

"A round of beers."

"Alright." Edward spun me around and gently forced me back to the bar, walking behind me the whole time. He grabbed four beers and popped the tops off them. "That table's mine for the rest of the night."

"But you're not working."

"I am now." He smiled and took the men their beer.

I stayed away from them for the rest of the night and Edward made sure they were taken care of. They eventually left and the bar started dying down about an hour before close. I was thankful. I was absolutely exhausted.

"You okay?" Edward asked, stepping beside me and throwing a towel over his shoulder. He started stacking the mugs he'd just washed.

"Yeah I'm just really tired." I sighed. "Listen, thank you…for what you did earlier. You didn't have to you know."

"Yes I did. You didn't deserve that."

"So you were watching me then?" I kinked my eyebrow and laughed.

"I might have been," Edward said. He looked down at the mugs and I swear I saw him blush. "Kind of hard not to."

Esme cleared her throat as she walked between us and glanced at Edward.

"Why don't you take Bella home?" She glanced at me. "She looks exhausted."

"No, Esme. I can stay and help clean up. It's okay," I protested.

"Nonsense. You worked your ass off tonight and you did a hell of a job. You look like you're about to pass out on the spot. Go home and sleep."

"Are you sure?" I asked.

"I'm not going to tell you again. Get your ass home and get in bed. Edward's going to drive you, I don't want you falling asleep at the wheel."

I nodded and went in the back to grab my purse. When I came back out, Edward was waiting for me by the front door.

"Shall we?" He asked. He flipped off the switch for the sign outside and held the door open for me.

"You really don't have to drive me home, I think I can make it."

"It's not a problem. I'm used to the long hours and I don't mind the walk back. I spend enough time on the water that it's kind of nice when you get to walk on steady land." He smiled as we reached my truck. I handed him the keys and I hopped into the passenger seat.

He slung his arm over the back of the seat and started towards my house. I nearly fell asleep during the short drive, but I managed to keep my eyes open. Edward finally pulled into my driveway and glanced up at the house.

"Jesus, Bella. Even in the dark I can tell that thing is falling apart. You're not really living here are you?"

"Yep." I yawned and hopped out of the truck. Edward surprised me when he started to follow me inside. I nearly tripped over the porch swing in the darkness and fumbled with my key.

I flipped on the lights as soon as we got inside. Edward looked around in amazement. "This place is a piece of shit," he laughed.

"Don't hate on my house." I smiled. "It's got character."

Edward looked around a little more, coming to stand in front of the fireplace. He stretched his arms over his head, causing his shirt to ride up a little bit. I noticed the top of his boxers peeking out from his jeans and a scruff of hair just above it. I licked my lips and hummed. This man was beautiful.

"I should get going," he said.

"You could stay here," I blurted out. "I mean…you look really tired. You could sleep on the couch."

"I wouldn't want to impose."

"It's no imposition. Please stay."

"Well if you're going to beg me." He laughed and winked at me.

"I'll get you a blanket." I went upstairs and grabbed one of the blankets off of my bed. I started back down the steps, pausing halfway down when I saw Edward pull his shirt up over his head. I noticed an anchor tattoo on his right shoulder.

I'd slowly come to admit that I liked him. I mean I had a crush on him. Not like on the playground where you kick the boy you like and then run away. I really, truly liked him even though I barely knew him.

I took a deep breath and continued down the stairs. "Here's a blanket."

"Thanks." Edward turned and grabbed the blanket from me. He sat down on the couch and shook it out on top of him.

"Well…goodnight." I nodded and headed back upstairs.

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><p><strong>AN: Woohoo! Got one more in for today : )**

**A couple people have asked about the mystery element of the story and it will slowly reveal itself but it does revolve around the prologue. **

**Have a great night and I hope you enjoyed this chapter, I'm with Bella. I definitely have a crush on Lobstermansailorbartenderward...or whatever you wanna call him LOL **


	6. Chapter 6

Even though I was exhausted, I couldn't sleep. I tossed and turned the whole night, completely unsettled and anxious about the gorgeous sailor sleeping on my couch downstairs. He made me a little nervous. Not in the "I'm going to murder you with an ax way." More like the "My eyes are so deep that I could seduce you with one look" way.

I eventually fell asleep sometime around sunrise and was awoken a few hours later by sounds outside. I stretched and wiped at my eyes, wondering what the hell was going on. I ran my fingers through my mess of a hair as I shuffled down the stairs and started towards the front door. I noticed Edward wasn't on the couch so I assumed he'd gotten up early and went back into town.

The pounding got louder and louder as I approached the door and pulled it open. I stepped out onto the porch and instantly froze.

Edward was pounding away with a hammer, rehanging my porch swing.

"Morning sunshine," he said with a laugh.

"You're fixing my house…" I murmured. "What time is it?"

"11:30." He shrugged. "And I figured you could use some help. I don't have anything else to do until we ship out again."

"How long have you been awake?" I yawned.

"Woke up around 6:30. I guess I'm used to not sleeping much." He held up the other end of the swing and started hammering. "You might want to run a comb through that." He smirked and nodded to my hair.

"Okay Sasquatch. The first time I saw you, you could have braided the hair on your face." I smiled and rolled my eyes as I walked back inside.

"Keep it coming, Swan."

I went upstairs and pulled my hair back into a ponytail before throwing on a sweatshirt and heading back outside.

"So…" I said. "Where do we start?"

"I already reattached your shutter and made sure the others were secure. The sink inside was a little tricky, but it should be good as new. Once I reattach this, I think a good, fresh coat of paint might go a long way."

My jaw dropped. "You already did all of that?"

"Yep. So what color do you want it?" Edward asked.

"Oh." I glanced back up at the house. "I guess I never really thought about changing it."

"You should pick something bright. Then maybe I'll be able to see it every time I come back into port. It'll be something to look forward to." He smiled and shoved his hands in his pockets. I blushed.

"Yellow?" I mused.

"Perfect. Shall we?" He motioned to my truck.

"Give me five minutes…" I bit down on my lip and rushed inside, ready to do a marathon beauty session.

I ran a comb through my hair, brushed my teeth and put some light makeup on before actually getting dressed and running back downstairs. Edward was already waiting in my truck, tapping on the steering wheel to the music. Despite the fact that I was all about women's rights and equality in relationships, I couldn't say that I didn't find him driving my truck incredibly sexy.

"Ready?" He asked as I jumped inside.

"Let's go get some paint."

We drove into town and stopped at the local hardware store. We picked out a color named Dandelion and Edward picked up a few more things for the house. The cashier smiled sadly at him and asked him how he'd been. Edward quickly brushed him off with a smile as he mumbled something about doing fine. He protested when I tried to pay, but I told him I owed him. Let me count the ways I could owe him.

I dropped him off at The Wharf before I went back to the house because he had some things he had to do before he worked tonight. He promised he would be back tomorrow to help with the paint.

I drove back through town with the window rolled down and the sea breeze blowing through my hair. The air was so fresh and pure out here. I loved it.

Just before I left town, I spotted Alice walking down the sidewalk with a large shopping bag in her hand.

"Hey, Alice," I called out. I slowed and pulled slightly off to the side of the road.

"Bella!" She waved and jogged over. "What are you up to?"

"I was um…I was just with Edward. I mean dropping him off."

"Really?" She arched her eyebrow.

"So what's his story?" I rested my arms on the window.

She shrugged, suddenly silent. I wasn't quite so sure how to take it.

"Okay. Well I guess I'll see you tomorrow night?" I asked. Esme had given me tonight off.

"Sure." She smiled and stepped back from the car. "See you tomorrow night."

I nodded and started off again. That was strange.

I made myself dinner and sat on my brand new porch swing for awhile, watching the sun slowly creep towards the water. I'd been at The Wharf so much lately and now I felt like I had nothing to do. Maybe I could go in and surprise Edward? I smiled to myself and grabbed my keys.

Esme looked up in surprise when I walked through the doors at the bar ten minutes later.

"Hey Honey, I thought I told you stay home tonight?" She asked, wiping down the bar.

"I know." I smiled. "I'm not working. I'm looking for Edward."

"Well he's not in tonight." She turned her eyes down to the floor.

"Oh?" I cocked my head to the side. "I'd thought for sure he told me he was working tonight. I must have misunderstood," I mumbled. "Thanks anyway."

As I left, I spotted Emmett and Jasper sitting in a booth in the corner. I stopped over to say hello.

"Miss B," Emmett said. "How are you doin?"

"I'm good. How about yourself?"

"Can't complain." He took a drink of his beer.

"Have you seen Edward?"

"He's stocking," Emmett said.

"He's sleeping," Jasper said at the same time.

"So what is it? Is he stocking or sleeping? Esme said he wasn't working tonight," I said.

"He was stocking and then he didn't feel well so now he's sleeping…" Emmett said. He was lying. I knew he was. But I didn't have the strength or right to argue. I barely knew them. I barely knew Edward. Even though this mystery was on its way to driving me insane, I didn't really deserve the truth, did I?

"Okay. Well goodnight." I waved and left the bar.

Something wasn't sitting right with me. Where was he? Why did that cashier look at Edward like he was a wounded puppy at the store earlier? And Alice was one of the most talkative people in the world. Why couldn't she talk about Edward? Why did she brush it off and seem so hesitant? Especially when he seemed nothing short of wonderful. It made me think there was something more to it, more to him that I didn't see. Part of that scared me.

When I got home, I tried to let it go. It was impossible. It was almost like someone had put a locked box in front of me and was telling me I wasn't allowed to have the key. Alice was hiding something. Edward was hiding something. With each passing moment, I'd grown more and more sure of it. And I needed to find out what it was.

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><p><strong>AN: And the mystery of Edward beings... *wiggles eyebrows***

**Thanks for your reviews and retweets and...reading...and raving. I find all the best things begin with "r" : )**

**I've had some people ask about pictures and such for this story. Would you guys like a blog for it with pictures, playlists ect? I wasn't planning on doing one since it's a mini fic, but if you want it I'll do it because I love making blogs! Let me know : )**


	7. Chapter 7

Edward showed up the next morning to paint, just like he said he would. He was wearing a long sleeved tee shirt, jeans and a Boston Red Sox hat.

"Ready to paint?" He asked.

"Yep." I pulled my hair up into a ponytail and followed him outside. I lingered a few steps behind him as he walked because my brain was still trying to process the mystery of him. I couldn't help but zone out on him, watching his shoulders as I contemplated all of the options.

"Bella?" He snapped his fingers at me. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah." I shook my head. He leaned down to open the first paint can and poured some into the pan. I silently grabbed a paintbrush and started going at it.

We didn't speak for the next hour as we worked on one side of the house. I felt him glance my way several times, but I always acted like I didn't notice.

"Okay, what's wrong?" He asked. I finally looked at him. He had a yellow paint smudge across his cheek. It was adorable.

"Nothing." I shook my head and turned back to the house.

"Bullshit." He stopped painting. "If you don't tell me what's wrong I'm going to accidentally paint you instead of the house." He stepped between me and the panel I was painting.

"No, you won't…" I sighed and stepped beside him.

He laughed and bent over to dip his hands in the paint. I squealed as he gently grabbed my face. The paint was freezing against my skin.

"What the hell are you doing?" I shrieked.

"You should know that I never lie, Bella. Especially about threats." He folded his arms across his chest and smirked. I wanted to tell him that he was lying now. That he lied about where he was last night.

Instead I grunted and threw my paintbrush at him. It was horribly off mark and ended up hitting him in the crotch instead of square in the chest. He clenched his jaw as I gasped and froze with fear.

"Did I…" I trailed off. "Did I hurt you?" I whispered.

"I've taken a lobster cage to the boys on more than one occasion, love. I don't think a flimsy paintbrush is going to break 'em." He winked and reached down for the paintbrush. I thought he was just going to hand it to me, but instead he smirked and lunged towards me. The next thing I knew I was pinned against the freshly painted house with a paintbrush threatening my face.

Being this close to him was a completely different experience than watching him from afar. I could see the subtle stubble along the line of his jaw. And the way his eyelashes curled up just perfectly. There was a small scar just above his lip that I'm sure you wouldn't notice unless you were looking. I found myself wondering what it felt like.

Without another thought, I reached up and ran my finger across it. "What's this from?" I whispered.

"Got a hook stuck in my lip," he said softly. "Emmett and I were messing around when we shouldn't have been." He glanced down at me and offered a small smile.

"You get hurt a lot huh?" I asked.

"I've got a lot of scars, Bella. Some you can see and some you can't." His smile faltered and he glanced down at his feet, almost looking like he'd told his deepest secret. In reality, I was more confused than ever.

The loud roar of a car engine made him step back from me and clear his throat. He peered around the corner and cursed. "Of course."

"Playing hide and seek are we?" Emmett yelled. "Where are you guys, we're here to help!"

I heard the voices of Jasper, Rosalie and Alice, laughing and chatting with each other as they approached the house. They smiled as Edward and I rounded the side of the house and waved.

I didn't get to speak to Edward privately for the rest of the day. He kept glancing at me through the hustle and bustle of our guests, almost like he was conflicted about something. We all spent the rest of the day painting the house and when it was finished, everyone left, exhausted from the day's work.

"Thanks, guys," I mumbled. They piled into their car as Edward slinked into his. He glimpsed at me once more before turning his key and flipping on his radio. He offered a slight wave and backed out of the driveway.

I couldn't get rid of that feeling. Secrecy. Deceit. I didn't know at that point what his motives were or any of the specifics, but I was convinced more than ever that Edward was hiding something from me. Everyone was.

The next night at the bar was insanely busy. I guess a few boats had just come into town so it was packed with fishermen from all up and down the coast. I saw Edward early in the evening, but he seemed to have disappeared by the time we started shutting down. I kept a cautious eye out for him; ready to confront him about whatever he was hiding. I knew deep down that I didn't know him. I didn't really deserve his secrets or to know what was in his heart. But something was tugging me, pulling me into the depths of him and despite the fact that he didn't owe me anything, I needed to know. I had to know.

I helped Alice close down the bar and started back towards my truck. As I drove slowly back through town, I rolled down my window to get some cool, fresh air. I looked out over the small cove and out towards the lighthouse on the island out at its entrance. The light was whirring around, highlighting the slight fog that was coming inland.

Something else caught my eye. A small boat coming ashore, almost back to the docks. It was almost like he appeared out of the mist, the small lantern on his little boat glowing through the thick air.

I pulled over to the side of the road and cut the engine to watch. The boat met the dock and the sole occupant stepped out and tied it down. He stood up and ran his fingers through his hair as he looked back out over the water, squinting towards the lighthouse.

He finally turned around and started back up towards the road. As he passed under a streetlight, my breath caught in my throat. It was Edward.

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><p><strong>AN: Probably last update for today. I was a bad kid and took an accidental coma nap all afternoon so I got NOTHING accomplished. Except I did put a blog up. It's nothing super special and I won't really be adding much to it unless its necessary, but there are pictures and a playlist : )**

**http : / mandyleigh87-thewharf . blogspot . com (take out the spaces)**


	8. Chapter 8

I froze inside my truck and watched him walk down the road towards The Wharf and go inside. I sat there for a few moments to make sure he hadn't seen me before I went home.

The next couple of nights, I watched him very closely, keeping an eye on where he was and where he wasn't. After the bar closed down, I parked my car in the same spot and waited for him. Two nights in a row there was nothing. Then on the third night, I saw him again. The night was clear, reflecting perfectly off the calm water. I saw the light of his boat all the way out at the lighthouse. He did the same thing he'd done the first night. Tied up the boat once he got to shore, looked back at the lighthouse and started walking towards The Wharf.

The fourth night, I fell asleep in my truck without seeing him at all and woke up the next morning to someone tapping on my car window.

"Bella," Edward said. There was no hint of a smile on his face as he studied me through the window, almost like he knew I'd been watching him.

I wiped the drool off of my face and rolled the window down. "Good morning," I mumbled.

"What are you doing out here?" He asked.

"I uh…uh…." I looked around and spotted a coffee shop. "Just coming into town to get some coffee. I was really tired, I must have fallen asleep." I knew how ridiculous that sounded, but it was all I had.

"Well I was just headed in there myself, do you mind if I join you?" He eyed me suspiciously.

"No. Not at all." I smiled and got out of the truck. Edward placed his hand on the small of my back and I glanced up at him as we stepped into the coffee shop.

We ordered our coffee and Edward refused to let me pay. We grabbed a table by the window and he started fumbling with his coffee collar.

"So what's the deal with Rose? She didn't really say a word to me at my house the other day. I wanted to thank her for helping, but she didn't really give me a chance to."

"Rose has a very peculiar personality. I wouldn't take it personal." He sipped his coffee.

"And her and Emmett? I thought they were divorced?"

"They are. Divorce doesn't mean they're not soul mates. They are. They punish themselves more than they should, staying as close as they are. They have a few slip ups now and then, but for the most part they keep it together."

"What do you mean by slip ups?"

"As in I saw Rose leaving early this morning with the same clothes she had on last night."

"Oh!" I mouthed.

"So what are your thoughts on our little town so far?" He asked, finally relaxing a little and offering up a smile.

"I like it." I nodded. "And thank you again for helping with the house."

"It's not done yet." He shook his head. "There's still some things I'd like to do."

"That's not really necessary." I shrugged. "I mean aren't you guys heading back out soon?'

"A couple of weeks." He took a sip.

"How'd you learn to do all that stuff anyway?" I asked.

"I'm a guy." He winked at me and for a few moments, the strange, mysterious Edward from the past few days disappeared. He was like he was at my house that first day, like that first night closing up the bar. And I liked him.

"I'm surprised someone hasn't snatched you up already. Do you have a wife somewhere you're not telling me about?" I teased.

His jaw tightened and he looked down at the table. "Bella, listen. I know that you know…" He trailed off. "There are just some things I have a hard time saying…Shit."

"Everyone does," I whispered.

He took a deep breath and glanced up at me. "Would you like to go on a date with me?"

"I'd love to?" I said slowly. It wasn't that I didn't want to, but his mood swings were intense and I wasn't sure what to make of them. Understanding Edward was like solving a Rubik's cube…blindfolded.

"Good." He smiled and relaxed again.

A couple of teenagers sat down in the table next to us with a younger girl. They were being loud, obnoxious little shitheads, just like every boy was at that age.

"You know the lighthouse is haunted, don't you?" One of the boys said, teasing the younger girl.

"No it's not," she whined.

"Haven't you ever heard of the Lady in White?"

Edward visibly stiffened as the boy continued on.

"She walks around the balcony, her white dress matted against her body from the ocean, just waiting for her love to return from the sea." He leaned in closer. "And sometimes…when it's really quiet at night. You can hear her scream right before she jumps to her death."

My breaths came out in short, staccato puffs as I watched Edward with cautious eyes. His hand was tightening around his coffee cup, his fingers trembling. His other hand rested rigid on his leg, clenching and unclenching into a fist.

"I have to go," he said quickly. Before I could say another word, he got up and stormed out, practically slamming the door shut on his way.

I glared at the two boys, not understanding why they scared him away, but knowing that they had. Something about that story set him off. And I needed to find out what it was.

I spun my chair around and scooted up to them with a large grin on my face. "Hello, boys." I turned to the little girl. "Hi, sweetie."

"Who are you?" One of the boys asked.

"Doesn't matter. I want you to tell me all you know about that story…the lady in white."

"It's just a stupid ghost story," he said.

"I told you it wasn't true! I'm telling mom!" The little girl whined.

"The story must have started somewhere…" I mused. "An old folk tale from the area or something?" They both shrugged. "Fine." I waved them off. "Get out of here. And stop scaring your little sister."

They scoffed at me and left. I went back to my coffee, staring out the window towards the lighthouse. What happened out there and what did it have to do with Edward?

One of the waitresses eyed me from another table as she wiped it down.

"You want to know about the Lady in White?" She murmured.

I turned towards her and nodded. "Yes. Do you know?"

"Nobody talks about it anymore. Too painful." She bit her lip. "Try the library."

"Thanks," I whispered. I pulled out a few extra dollars and left it on my table.

I didn't have to be at the bar until later tonight so I walked the couple of blocks to the library only to find it closed for renovations. I hadn't had the time or money to get Internet hooked up at the house so right now I was at the contractor's mercy. It was supposed to be finished next week so I guess I just had to wait it out. Although now that I knew there was something else to the story, the wait was going to kill me.

The next couple of days passed by quickly. The bar was still busy and I spent most of the days working on something at the house. Edward stopped by every now and then to help, but we didn't speak about what happened at the coffee shop. I didn't ask and he didn't seem eager to share.

A week before they were scheduled to ship out again, Esme let me out of work early. Her only explanation was a large grin on her face and the threat of unemployment if I stepped foot back in that bar before tomorrow night.

I grabbed my jacket and looked around one last time in confusion before I stepped outside. I ran right into something at the door and almost tumbled to the floor.

"Whoa, there!" Edward said. "Had a little too much, Miss?" He grinned and steadied me.

"No," I teased. "What are you doing?" I hugged my arms around myself.

"Taking you out." He winked and pulled me outside.

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><p><strong>AN: HE'S TAKING HER OUT! : D Where do you think they're going?**

**Probably the only update tonight because I need to get some writing done. And on a personal note, super excited that I just signed up for NaNoWriMo! Have a good night : )**


	9. Chapter 9

**I have more chapters written than I thought! One more for you tonight : )**

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><p>"I was looking for you all night…" I said as we ambled down the street. It was dark, but the night was completely clear. "I thought maybe you'd snuck off somewhere." I cleared my throat. I knew exactly where I thought he'd snuck off to. I thought he was out at that lighthouse.<p>

"I had some things to do." He grinned and I couldn't help but feel warm. Despite his sometimes mysterious behavior, he seemed to have this way about him. Like even though he didn't make sense, the confusion made perfect sense to me. It was a part of him. And I found myself always wanting to know more.

"Where are we going?" I asked.

"That would be a surprise." He laughed and stuck his hands in his pockets as he turned around and walked backwards in front of me.

"What do I have to do to get it out of you?" I teased.

He smirked and stopped abruptly, causing me to run into him again. My hands landed on his chest and I swallowed hard as I slowly glanced up at him.

"There you go again, Swan. Can't you watch where you're going?"

"Maybe you should steer clear," I mumbled.

"Now that wouldn't be any fun, would it?" His eyes flickered towards my lips as they curled up into a smile.

"When do I get to see it?" I asked.

He gasped. "I'm appalled. It's only our first date and you're asking to see it?"

I blushed. "I meant my surprise."

"How quickly can you turn your head?" He nodded to his left. I followed his suggestion and glanced out over the water. Down at the dock, floating just off the boardwalk, was a boat. Not just any boat. The boat. Their boat. Except it looked a little like a Christmas tree with all of the lights hanging from it.

"You're taking me out on the boat?" I asked.

"I'm taking you out on the boat." He grabbed my hand and we started down the steps to the dock. When we reached the boat he jumped on and grabbed onto me to help me board.

"Aren't you going to get in trouble? I mean isn't Carlisle going to be mad."

"Yeah. He'll probably be mad." He shrugged and started untying us from the dock.

"Edward!" I scolded with a smile.

"What?" He laughed. "What's he going to do? Fire me? Please. I'm his best man." He pushed his sleeves up and went to the steering panel. The boat grumbled to a start and we started floating away from the dock, away from land, away from everyone

We drove through the water of the bay and towards the lighthouse. When we passed, Edward looked up and for a moment, his eyes glazed over in sadness. He cleared his throat and snapped back into line.

I crossed my arms over my chest and sauntered towards him. "Can I drive?" I asked.

"I don't know, can you?" He cocked his eyebrow.

"Show me?"

He stepped back from the wheel, just enough to allow me to slip in between them.

His hands brushed against my hips, holding me steady against him.

"Grip the wheel. Gentle, but firm." He trailed his hands up my ribs and down my arms to take my hands in his. He guided them to the wheel and wrapped them around. "There you go…" He murmured.

He brought his hands back down to my waist and leaned into my hair. I felt his nose nuzzle against my neck and I smiled.

"Am I doing it right….?" I whispered.

"Mmmhmm…"

His lips grazed across my neck and I shivered.

"Are you cold?" He asked.

"No." I shook my head gently. "No, I'm not cold."

He reached around me and turned the boat off. His hands released me as he walked around to the front of the boat and threw the anchor out.

I took a moment to actually look around. We were surrounded by nothing but the darkness of the sea. No land, no lights except those on the boat. We were just floating along in a dazzling, intoxicating solitude.

"So….tell me about fishing…lobstering…whatever it's called?" I asked, rounding the steering counsel and joining him at the front of the boat. He laughed and pulled a blanket from a small bag, laying it out on the deck. He sat down and patted the spot next to him. I obliged, sitting down and laying back beside him.

"What do you want to know?" He asked.

"Everything."

"Started helping Captain down on the docks when I was a kid. Once I hit high school, I started working summers and during breaks. As soon as I graduated, I just…fell right into step."

"Did you ever think about doing something else?" I asked.

"It's all I've ever known, Bella. That's the thing with these small towns on the coast. We live and breathe the sea. It was my first love."

"And will it be your last?" I whispered as I turned towards him, feeling a little embarrassed of my bold behavior tonight.

"It's the only one that will never leave." He bit his lip.

I felt brave. I reached across the small space between us and grabbed his hand. The look in his eye, the one of loss and of pain, cut me so deep I didn't know if it would ever completely heal. Almost like I would bare his scar for the rest of my life.

He turned on his side and smiled a little. "I like you, Bella."

"Good." I smirked and leaned closer. "I like you too."

God, I wanted to kiss him. I wanted to lean over and touch his skin, taste the hint of salt and fish. It wasn't as disgusting as I would have thought it would be. He always smelled just like the sea.

"I think I might want to kiss you." He sighed and started looking a little nervous. Nervous? Maybe cautious. Like he was crossing into unchartered territory. Except it was hard for me to imagine a man this beautiful never being kissed.

"Is there a problem with that?" I whispered.

"I don't know." He licked his lips and inched towards me. I wasn't sure what to make of his answer, but I didn't really have time to think about it. The moment his lips pressed against mine, my mind went blank. I didn't think. Just felt. And I felt it deep.

Soft. Rough. Fiery burn. Warm fuzzies. Melting bodies. Ecstasy….Everything.

He moaned a rolled on top of me, forcing the weight of his body over me. My hands went to his hair, tugging and scratching at the beautiful bronze locks.

His lips tightened, almost in a panic, before I heard him mumble something against my lips. His mouth drifted away from my lips, kissing my jaw and down my neck. He nibbled at the hollow of my neck as his hands caressed up from my shoulder to my hair. A moment later, he pulled away from me.

He stared down at me, breathing heavily and watching me with the most confused expression.

"Are you okay?" I murmured.

"I think so."

I narrowed my eyes at him and pushed hard against his chest. I wiped my lips off on my sleeve and stood up. "You know, this whole mysterious thing was kind of sexy in the beginning, Edward. But I'm not so sure anymore. What the hell is your deal? Huh?" I crossed my arms over my chest.

"Bella…" He started.

"No." I shook my head. "Don't Bella me. If you're going to just…kiss me and then never tell me what's going on inside your head then you might as well take me back to shore." I sat down and waited, keeping my eyes towards the water.

I closed my eyes as he stepped behind me and snaked his arms around my waist.

"I don't know how to want you…"

I turned around to face him. "You don't have to know anything, Edward. You either do or you don't."

"It's not that simple."

"It is." I sat down again and waited for him to take me back. This date was over. And I wasn't so sure if we were ever going to get started.

We drove back to shore in silence. When he docked the boat, I jumped out, not bothering to wait for him. I walked to my truck, got inside, and drove back to my house. I sat up in my bedroom for almost the whole night, snuggled in my chair looking out the window. The lighthouse was on, which I'd noticed wasn't always this case. To keep my mind off of things, I just watched the light swirl round and round. Highlighting the water and the coast before disappearing into the nothingness off shore. Round and round and round.

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><p><strong>AN: Errr...not going to go in the "Best First Date Ever Book" but the first part was pretty nice, right?**


	10. Chapter 10

Edward and I didn't speak for the next two days. Even when I saw him at work, I kept myself busy so I wouldn't even think about talking to him.

The bar wasn't too crowded tonight. My only table was a booth of old, smelly men. There were one or two guys sitting up at the bar, drinking their beer in solitude. Alice had the night off, so it was just Esme and I…and Edward. He was mostly stocking and taking inventory so I hadn't seen him much so far. I wasn't sure how I felt about that. I'd kind of missed him these past few days, but I was still so frustrated with him. I didn't know what I was supposed to feel, honestly. Everything seemed to contradict each other so I was left somewhere in the middle. Almost like I was caught in a tug of war, leaning and struggling against each side.

I carried out another round for the group in the booth and started washing out some mugs at the bar.

"You must be new in town," someone said.

I looked up and found one of the solo drinkers smiling at me.

"Um." I nodded. "Yeah. Just moved here."

"Mike." He held out his hand and I shook it.

"I'm Bella."

"Nice to meet you, Bella."

"You too." I smiled and wiped down another glass. "So what do you do?"

"Same as everyone else around here." He took a sip of his beer.

"You work on a boat?" I sighed.

"Yeah. Best boat on the ocean." He winked at me and I instantly knew he was flirting.

"I don't know about that one, Newton," Esme teased. She glanced towards the back hallway and cleared her throat.

I peered over my shoulder and saw Edward standing in the archway, a towel slung over his shoulder as he carried a crate of beer. I bit down on my lip and almost felt guilty for talking to this guy. Why? Why the hell should I feel guilty? He was the one with issues.

"Hey, do you have a break coming up?" Mike asked.

"Uh…" I peeked at my booth and saw they'd barely touched their mugs. "Yeah. I can take a break."

"I was going to go have a smoke outside, do you want to join me?"

"Sure." I nodded and set down what I was working on "Esme, I'm taking my break. I'll be back in fifteen."

"Alright." She eyed me curiously and went back to her work.

I wiped my hands and walked around the bar before following Mike out the back door. There was a small alley behind the bar, mostly where the drunks went to pass out for the night. There was a dumpster or two and some of the leftover and broken crates from the bar. It smelled like piss and clam chowder.

Mike took out a cigarette and offered one to me. I shook my head. "So how long have you worked for Esme?" He lit his cigarette and took a drag.

"Not long" I leaned back against the brick building and crossed my arms. "What boat do you work on?"

"The Shark Bait. My uncle Aro owns it, I just work it."

"Kind of like Edward and Captain," I mused.

"Kind of." Mike smiled. "Edward and I went to high school together."

"Really?" Maybe he could tell me a little more about him. More than Edward had at least. Which wasn't saying much. "Were you two friends?"

"Hardly." He blew out some smoke. "We hated each other."

"Oh?" I squeaked. "And now?"

"Let's just say we aren't on each other's favorite people list." He laughed and took another drag. He leaned against the building beside me, close enough that his shoulder brushed against mine.

I started to feel a little uncomfortable. Not in the "I don't feel safe" way. More in the "I really wish someone else was out here with me" way.

I shivered and tried to inconspicuously scoot away from him.

I jumped as the door from the bar flew open. Edward stepped outside carrying a few wooden crates. He was oblivious to us as he threw them into the pile. When he turned, he finally spotted us and stopped for a minute.

"Bella," he said, nodding.

"Hi Edward." I cleared my throat and glanced at Mike. His eyes were narrowed at Edward while a devious smile played on his lips.

"Shouldn't you be getting back inside?" Edward cocked his eyebrow and opened the door for me.

"I think she has a few more minutes on her break, Cullen," Mike said.

"How the hell would you know, Newton?" Edward snapped.

"It's okay," I said, trying to calm the situation. "Mike, I should really get back. It was nice talking to you." I ducked inside and Edward followed me.

He grabbed my arm in the hallway, just before we walked back into the bar.

"Stay away from that guy. He's not…good," he said.

"You sure as hell haven't claimed your territory, Edward. I don't think you have any right to tell me what to do." I wriggled free from him and went back to work.

Mike came in a few minutes later and sat back down at his seat. I noticed Edward was a lot more present at the bar. He started helping me serve our few customers, even though it wasn't necessary. We were dead.

"What are you doing?" I mumbled as he reached in front of me to hand a customer his beer.

"Just helping out," he said, keeping his eyes on his work. He grabbed a towel and started wiping down the bar.

"I don't need help," I snapped. "There's no one in here."

"Yeah, Edward. Get off her ass," Mike chimed in.

"Stay out of it," I whispered to Mike.

"You should follow your own advice," Edward said. He went to stand in front of Mike, leaning slightly over the bar. "I see the way you're watching her and I don't like it."

"Tough." Mike laughed.

"You need to leave." Edward took his beer from him and emptied it in the sink.

"What the hell are you doing?" Mike stood up from his seat.

"Kicking you out of my bar. Get out." Edward turned away from him, but Mike reached over the counter and grabbed his shirt.

I held my breath as Edward spun around and threw his fist towards Mike. It hit him square in the jaw and he fell back onto the gross floor. I gasped and watched as Mike wiped at his lip, laughing under his breath.

"Big mistake, Cullen," he mumbled. He was just about to jump up when Esme appeared with a baseball bat.

"Get out of my bar, Newton. You're done," she said. Edward was breathing heavily beside her, staring daggers at Mike. "Get out!"

Mike stood up and flipped Edward off before storming out.

"Thanks Ma," Edward said.

She grabbed him roughly by the front of his shirt. "You'll be lucky if I don't tell your father about this, boy. What's my one rule?"

"No fights in your bar," Edward said.

"No fights in my bar," she repeated. "What the hell is wrong with you?"

"Bella…" Edward started.

"Bella is a grown woman, Edward. She can take care of herself. She doesn't need two little boys in a pissing match over her."

"But," he said, his fists clenching at his sides as he glanced over her shoulder at me.

"You know what? You get out too. Walk it off. Come back when you've got a level head." She poked him with the bat. "Out with you."

He stalked off towards the back, throwing his towel on the floor as he went.

"Esme, I'm so sorry…" I said.

"Wasn't your fault, sweetheart. Apparently my boy has some thinking to do." She patted my back. "Why don't you take off for the night? I don't need you here and whether you mean to or not, you're messing with Edward's head tonight. Just go home and relax."

"Okay." I nodded. "Sorry again."

"No worries. I can handle it." Esme started tending to the last few customers.

I packed up my things and headed to my truck. I pulled around to the front of the bar and turned down Main Street, along the water. I stopped when I reached the dock, where I'd seen Edward before. I saw his boat, already out in the water heading towards the lighthouse. I watched as the boat ambled to it and docked at the base. The light at the front went out, making me lose him in the darkness.

I shook my head and started home. What did Edward have to do with the lighthouse and what was he doing out there? Is that where he was all those nights he was missing from work? I thought figuring out where he went would answer all of my questions. It only added to the list.

When I got home, I took a shower and got ready for bed. Just before I lay down, I went to the window to draw the curtains and I noticed that the lighthouse was on again. My eyes lingered there before I sighed and closed the curtain shut. I laid down in bed and fell asleep.

I woke in the middle of the night to soft knocks at my front door. I shot up out of bed and listened closely, hoping I'd imagined it. The clock read 2:30 AM and I had no idea who would be at my door this late.

I gasped as the knocks sounded again. I crept out of bed and tiptoed down the stairs, watching my front door the whole time.

I pulled back the curtains beside the door and held my breath as I looked outside.

"Seriously?" I sighed. I opened the door and cocked my eyebrow. "You couldn't have called?"

"You wouldn't have answered," Edward said.

"What are you doing here?" I leaned against the doorframe.

He slipped inside and waited for me at the bottom of the staircase. "Claiming my territory."

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><p><strong>AN: Is Eddie boy gonna finally start opening up a little? *puts up white flag of surrender* Please to be coming to claim my territory, Edward.**


	11. Chapter 11

**PSA: There are no lemons in this chapter. I noticed that some ppl were getting their lemon goggles out and were excited and I didn't want you to start getting anxious reading through it LOL He will claim that...territory eventually but not right now. They're just not there yet : )**

* * *

><p>Edward slept in my bed that night. And the next night. We kissed…a little. We talked a lot. About almost everything except what I wanted to know.<p>

"I can't, Bella," he said.

"Why? Why is it so hard?"

"Something happened in my past, okay?" He ran his fingers through his hair and snuggled into the pillow. "It was fucking hard and in a small town, everyone knew. Nobody talks about it anymore."

If something hurt an entire town, I couldn't imagine it being a little thing. It was big.

The thing with Mike had helped our relationship…or whatever this was. And as frustrating as he was, I couldn't deny that I was developing feelings for Edward. Strong, hard, deep feelings.

The library was supposed to be open today so I was hoping to go into town and do some research. Edward couldn't tell me what happened to force this town into silence, but it didn't necessarily mean he didn't want me to know. He told me that himself.

"I have to go to work," he said, hopping out of bed.

"The Wharf?" I glanced at the clock. "This early?"

"Not The Wharf." He stumbled towards the door, pulling his pants on along the way. "We have to get the boat ready. We're leaving again soon." He lingered in the doorway and looked back at me with a smirk. "I'll see ya." He bit his lip and left.

I stayed in bed long after I heard the front door close and his car leave the driveway.

When I finally got up, I pulled on some jeans and headed into town. I spotted a lot of activity down at the docks. It looked like Captain's boat wasn't the only one preparing to head out.

I slowed and pulled over to the side of the road so I could watch. I smiled as I spotted Edward hauling boxes onto the boat. His white tank was dirty and grease stained above his dark cargo pants. Bon Jovi was blasting over the speakers as he looked over his shoulder and yelled something to Jasper, who was standing on deck. Captain was standing on the dock, observing and running through a list on his clipboard.

I rested my arms across the window frame and laid my head down. I blushed a little as Edward pulled his shirt up a little to wipe the sweat off his face. I bit down on my lip and whimpered, relishing the show.

"Hello, Bella!" Emmett said, suddenly beside the truck. He laughed and leaned against my door. "See something you like?" He wagged his eyebrows.

"You smell bad," I said.

"Thanks." He smiled. "So you and my brother, huh?"

"I don't know what you mean." I smirked and glanced over his shoulder to watch Edward again.

"Alright. Don't talk. I know already." He started to walk away, but turned back to narrow his eyes at me. "I've seen things."

"Okay, creep." I laughed as he jogged down to the dock. He said something to Edward and his eyes immediately went to me. I waved a little and he motioned for me to wait a minute.

He loaded the last box by his feet and told Carlisle he'd be back. He smiled when he reached my truck.

"Finally up and dressed, I see," he teased.

"What time did you leave?"

"6 AM."

"No wonder I went back to sleep." I smiled and reached for his hair. "Do you have sunscreen on, you're going to get a sunburn." I pushed his sweaty hair back off his face as he rested his head on the door.

"No, Mom," he teased.

"You better not push me to tell Esme. She scares the shit out of me."

"You have no idea," he said.

"Edward!" Captain yelled. "Let's go!"

"Listen, I have to go." He licked his lips. "We'll be stopping for lunch soon. Do you want to join us?"

"Just heading back to the bar?"

"Probably."

"Yeah sure." I nodded. "I'm heading to the library for a bit, but I'll stop by in an hour or so?"

"Sounds good." He hesitated a moment before he leaned forward and pressed his lips to mine. Emmett hollered down from the dock and I felt him smile against my lips. "I'll see you in a bit," he whispered.

I nodded and watched him walk back down to the dock. He punched Emmett in the shoulder and glanced back at me as I drove away.

I parked at the library and was happy to see it was finally open. I stepped inside and noticed an older woman sitting at the front desk.

"Can I help you, Miss?" She asked, looking up from her paperwork.

"Yeah. I'm interested in looking up some of the town's history. Maybe some newspaper clippings or something?" Seeing that Edward was so young, I figured whatever he was hiding wasn't going to be in a history book.

"Of course. Do you have a membership with us?"

"No. I'm fairly new to town."

"Alright. Let's get you all set up." She pulled out some paperwork and handed me a pen. I noticed a painting of the lighthouse hanging behind her and thought it wouldn't hurt to ask about it.

"Do you know much about the lighthouse?" I asked casually as I started filling out the paperwork.

"Oh yes!" She smiled and I could tell she must really love her job. I always thought it'd be kind of cool to be a librarian, but it was obvious that she didn't get out much. I was about to get introduced to a walking encyclopedia. "It was built when I was just a girl, in the 1930's." I nodded. "The original owners were the Masens, one of the oldest families in town. When the family didn't want it anymore, they sold it to Mr. Cullen."

"Excuse me, did you say Cullen? As in Esme and Carlisle?"

"Well it was Carlisle's father who purchased it actually. He was the lighthouse keeper until he died about…" She tapped her chin as she calculated. "About seven years ago now, I think. There was no one interested in running it after that so it closed down."

"Do they still own it?" I asked.

"Well I believe so, yes."

"I see it sometimes…still lit up."

"Oh yes. That would be Edward. He was always very close with his grandfather." She laughed. "I remember him as a young fellow, begging his mother to let him stay out there with his grandfather at night, just to watch the boats come in." I handed her my paperwork and she checked over it. "I can imagine it hit him hard when Eleazer died. He begged his parents not to sell it because it was his favorite place. Always believed that even with all this new technology that lighthouses still had a place. Guess he's an old soul in that way. Always believed it would lead the lost sailors home." She shook her head. "There was talk about converting it into a museum of some sort but that was before…" She trailed off.

"Before what?"

"Oh nothing, dear." She smiled and laughed. "Here's your library card and guide to where things are located here. Newspapers are stored in scrapbooks and can be found in the back room here." She pointed to the small map on the paper she'd handed me. "Just be careful not to take any out of their books, they're very fragile you see."

"Thank you."

I grabbed my things and headed back to the room she'd pointed out. There were shelves and shelves full of scrapbooks, all dated by the year. I figured whatever had happened occurred after Edward's grandfather died. If that was seven years ago, I guess I'd start there.

I perused through two years of newspapers, seeing nothing out of the ordinary. I did spot an article about Edward being crowned Prom King. His Queen was someone named Jane and they were apparently high school sweethearts. It made me wonder where she was now.

I was almost ready to give up as I started my third book, but I noticed something strange. In the corner, towards the bottom of the page there was a headline. _Local Woman Dies_…

I frantically flipped the page, looking for the rest of the article but there was nothing. It just stopped, almost like someone had cut it out. Something about the way my heart was racing told me that this had something to do with what I was looking for. And now that I'd found it, I hit a dead end. There was nothing else.

I scanned the papers in the days following the headline but found much of the same. Incomplete pages, missing parts. The people of this town had gone a long way to bury whatever happened here.

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><p><strong>Bitches.<strong>


	12. Chapter 12

The door opened behind me and I jumped, not expecting anyone. I whipped around and saw the woman from the front desk.

"Finding everything okay, dear?" She asked.

"Um…kind of." I held up one of the pages with a large square missing from the middle. "Do you know why there were articles cut out of some of these papers?"

She shrugged. "Don't know that I know anything about that." She narrowed her eyes at me curiously. "Do you mind me asking what you're looking for?"

"I…um…" I took a deep breath. "I want to know what happened to Edward Cullen."

Her face went blank for a moment before she composed herself. "I wouldn't concern yourself with such sad affairs."

I stood up and shook my head. "You don't understand. I…need to know. I care about him."

The woman glanced outside as another patron walked by. "Leave it alone, dear. That wound is too deep and dark to ever fix. Poor boy… Can I see you out?" She smiled again, almost like the conversation we'd just had didn't even happen. "We'll be closing for lunch soon."

"Of course. Do you have a computer lab in the library that will be open this afternoon?"

"Still closed for renovations," she chimed. "Sorry."

I was frustrated. And I could tell by the way this woman was looking at me that she was close to telling me, but just like everyone else she had her guard up. A newcomer asking about a small town's secrets was never a good thing. Never something that they would openly share, especially when it involved one of their own.

I hopped in my truck and headed towards The Wharf. I parked and headed inside, hearing Emmett's laughter before I even set foot in the door.

"Hey, Bella!" Alice called.

They were all sitting up to the bar with Esme spooning out some chowder in each of their bowls.

"Hey," I said with a smile. My eyes immediately went towards Edward. He was leaning down towards his bowl, shoving a spoonful of soup into his mouth. He cocked his eyebrow at me and wiped his mouth.

"Take a seat, young lady," Captain said. "Lots of food to go around."

"Thank you," I murmured. I walked over by Edward and nodded to the seat beside him. "This taken?"

"It is now."

I hopped up onto the barstool and Esme threw a steaming bowl in front of me. I smiled and dove in.

It was amazing, seeing them all together. They were loud and boisterous. They argued and nitpicked at every little thing about each other. But they were a family. And I could see and feel so much love between them it made me feel warm inside. I felt like I belonged. For the first time, since I got here, I felt like I was home.

I didn't even realize how late it was getting. The "just before dinner" crowd had started to roll into the bar and we were all still here. At some point during the day, Emmett had suggested we all start drinking. Now we were practically three sheets to the wind and getting ready for what looked to be a busy night.

Edward's arm had found its way around my waist. I leaned into him, placing my hand on his thigh, slightly towards in the inside. I saw Esme watching us interact with a strange look in her eye. I knew that she liked me, but it was almost like a mother bear watching her cub. She was protective of him. Like she was guarding him against any and everything that might hurt him.

I glanced up at the clock and down at my attire before I panicked.

"Edward, I have to be to work in an hour. Look at me, I'm disgusting," I whispered. I wasn't so drunk that I couldn't work. But I definitely wasn't good enough to drive back to my house to shower.

"I think you look sexy," he slurred.

"Ass." I laughed and punched his shoulder. "I'm sweaty and still wearing the shirt I wore to bed last night."

"You can use my shower," he whispered. "I mean if you want to."

"Okay."

He got up from his stool and grabbed my hand, pulling me with him.

"Esme, I'm going to go clean up before I start my shift okay?" I said as he pulled me along.

"Alright, sweetie." She watched us as we started towards the back of the bar. Everyone else was too involved in their own conversations to even notice that we'd left.

At the end of the hallway, there were two staircases that I'd never ventured up before. Edward pulled me to the one on the right and we stumbled up the stairs. At the top there was a landing, splitting again into two smaller sets of stairs. He pulled me to the right again and up towards a door. He reached into his back pocket and pulled out his keys, unlocking his door and stepping inside.

His apartment was small, but he didn't really need a lot of space I guess. There was one large room that acted as his bedroom and living room. A small TV and sofa sat at one end and his bed at another. Halfway between them was a door that led to the bathroom.

"Home sweet home," he said.

"It's nice."

He laughed and walked into the bathroom. He reached under the sink and grabbed a couple of towels for me before turning on the shower.

"Uh…if the water gets really cold, just bang on the wall a little and it should heat back up." He walked back out, scratching his head. "I'll try to find you another shirt to wear, eh?"

"Okay. Thanks." I stepped into the bathroom and closed the door behind me. It didn't latch well, but I didn't really care to push it again.

I undressed and stepped into the shower. It wasn't anything special, but it would work.

I used Edward's shampoo and soap, just the essentials for a shower. My main goal was to not smell like sweaty body.

I only had to pound on the wall once to get the hot water back before I stepped out and reached for a towel. I dried my body off and slipped my jeans back on. I remembered Edward was going to try and find me a shirt, so I put my bra on and peeked out into the room.

He was standing by his bed, staring down at what looked like a shirt from over here. His hands were in his pockets, eyes glazed over and far away. Almost like he wasn't here.

"Edward?" I called.

"Yeah." He shook his head and turned towards me.

"Did you find something?" I asked.

"Oh yeah. Here." He grabbed the shirt off of the bed and started towards me, his face softening with each step. His eyes went to my black bra. "On second thought, maybe you should just wear that."

"You want me to wear this…in a bar full of drunk men?" I cocked my eyebrow.

"Arms up!" He said. I smiled and raised my arms above my head as he threw the shirt over me. "Might be a little big on you." He pulled it down and looked it over.

"That's okay." I looked down and saw I was wearing his high school football shirt. I looked back over my shoulder and smiled when I saw "Cullen" plastered across the back. "Claiming your territory again?"

"It was my only clean shirt," he said, trying to hide a smile.

"Bullshit." I reached forward and tickled his stomach.

He laughed and instantly picked me up, throwing me over his shoulder and heading towards the bed.

He threw me onto the soft mattress as his hands explored my body, looking for my sensitive spots. I had the unfortunate luck of being extremely ticklish. I'd reacted so badly once I accidentally kicked Phil in the head. He had to go the emergency room.

Edward hovered over me, his breath washing over my face as his hands slowed over my stomach. The smile faded from his face as he glanced down at my lips.

His fingers reached up and gripped my chin as he leaned down to kiss me. His lips were rough, but not unpleasant. And I found myself wanting more. My tongue flicked against his lips, begging as he let me inside.

He allowed the weight of his body to press against mine and I found my legs wrapped around his waist, pulling him closer than even gravity would allow.

My body had always been physically aware of him, his presence and the essence of him. But now, being this close was almost too much. Like now that I'd gotten the candy, I was overdosing on the sugar.

His hand slipped under my shirt and immediately went to my bra, cupping my breast over the fabric as he trailed wet kisses down my jaw.

I moaned and threw my head back as I reached for his back, itching to feel his bare skin.

He was holding me, almost too tightly like he was afraid to let go. Like he was afraid of losing me. In that moment, I couldn't imagine ever wanting to leave the comfort of his arms. Every touch, every breath set me on fire from head to toe. I ached for the burn.

He thrust his hips into mine and I couldn't help but notice how hard he was beneath his jeans. He breathed a small moan, low enough that it barely escaped his lips as he rested his forehead against mine and did it again.

My hands found his face, holding it gently there just above mine.

A crash from downstairs broke through every thought running through my head and I realized I was supposed to be down there.

"I…should go…" I whispered.

Edward nodded, but didn't move. "You probably should." He kissed my cheek and again by my ear. "Because if you say here any longer you won't be leaving until morning," he whispered.

My eyes fluttered shut and in an instant he was off of me. He held out his hand and pulled me off the bed. I ran my fingers through my hair and started towards the door.

"I'll be down in a minute." He smiled and started towards the bathroom, pulling off his shirt along the way. I heard the shower start again as I closed his door behind me and headed downstairs.

Emmett was standing at the bar with Esme as I approached.

"Sorry I'm a little late, Esme." I cleared my throat and started pulling drinks from the cooler.

"Why Bella…you look a little flushed. What ever were you doing?" Emmett playfully narrowed his eyes.

"Nothing." I started out and hit up my first table. After I'd written down what they wanted, I spun back towards the bar just in time to see a freshly showered Edward step into the bar.

Emmett laughed. "Here comes Mr. Nothing, sporting a dazzling smile and a stylish dark blue button up that he must have borrowed from his sexy, older brother."

I smacked him with my towel as I headed back behind the bar, laughing under my breath.

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><p><strong>AN: Sorry this is going to be long *snicker* but I hope you'll stick with me.**

**First of all I am incredibly busy this weekend, so these next couple of days may be the only time where there's sporadic/no updating of this story because I'm going to be in and out so much that I literally just might not have time. So apologies in advance, I tried not to leave this one at too much of a cliffie, just in case I can't update : )**

**I'm cohosting a contest called the Time Warp Contest and we only have 2 entries, so if you're a writer and looking for something fun I hope you'll participate. The only requirement is that your one shot be set before 2000. Link is on my profile.**

**Secondly, I'm participating in the Season of Our Discontent contest. All you angst lovers make sure to go and read/review all the entries and vote when the time comes.**

**Lastly, this is the last weekend you can donate for my Breast Cancer Fundraiser, Pretty in Pink. There's a link on my profile to a blog with more information. But for $5 you can get a compilation of stories from authors like myself. I have donated 2 outtakes from The Roommate, one futuretake from Dead Man Walking, and a new one shot. I hope you'll consider donating!**

**That's it : )**


	13. Chapter 13

I fought against waking up the morning they were scheduled to leave. The last few days had been wonderful, even if he was still holding back. I felt like we were on this good path in our relationship, heading towards something good. And now we hit a big old roadblock because he was going to be gone for the next three weeks. The dead end at the library wasn't helping any.

I'd slept at his place the night before, too exhausted to drive back to my house. Edward had kissed my cheek when he slipped out of bed and told me to be at the dock in two hours to see them off.

I didn't want him to go. I thought maybe if I stayed in bed, he wouldn't. Like I was dreaming that he was leaving or something. I felt so close, so close to discovering the truth.

I finally pulled myself out of bed. I didn't bother to change out of my sweatpants, I just grabbed a sweater and wrapped a thick scarf around my neck and started downstairs. The bar was completely silent, which was the opposite of any other time I'd seen it.

I opened the front door and pulled the cardigan around my shoulders as I stepped outside. It was chilly this morning, so cold that I was thankful I had my scarf.

I wrapped my arms around myself and ambled down to the docks. There were quite a few people standing around. I noticed Alice and Esme of course. Rose was standing some feet away from them, smoking a cigarette and watching the docks below.

I came to stand with Esme and Alice. The boys were down at the boat, making the few last minute preparations before they left. I noticed a little boy of about five standing on the boat deck "helping" Emmett carry a lobster cage. The little boy set it down and puffed out his chest like he was a strong man. Emmett laughed and threw him over his shoulder as he stepped back onto the dock.

I slowly stepped away from Esme and Alice, closer to Rose.

"I never got to say thank you…" I mumbled. "For helping with my house."

"I didn't really do much," she said quickly.

"Well regardless. Thank you." I crossed my arms in front of me. "Your little boy?" I nodded towards Emmett, who was starting up here with the kid on his shoulders.

Rose smiled slightly and nodded, flicking her cigarette onto the ground.

"He's beautiful," I said.

"Thanks." She turned towards Emmett as they approached. "Hey, sweetie. You ready to go?"

"Can't I go with Daddy?" Jake asked.

"Not this time, Bud," Emmett said, setting him back down on the ground.

"Aw, shucks." Jake stomped his foot.

"Jake this is my friend Bella." Emmett nodded to me. I knelt down and smiled.

"Hi Jake."

"Hi." He gripped onto Emmett's leg, hiding himself behind it.

"Say bye bye to Daddy," Rose said.

"Bye bye Daddy."

Emmett lifted him up and hugged him before kissing his head and setting him back down again. "Bye Bud. I love you."

"I love you too Daddy." Jake waved as Rose took his hand and led him to the car. She got him all set and started back towards us. I felt like I was intruding so I took a few steps back toward Esme.

"Be careful out there, you hear me?" Rose said, keeping her arms crossed over her chest.

"Yes ma'am." He smiled and started back to the boat. Rose watched him for a moment before heading back to her car and driving away.

I understood it. With that one exchange I understood everything that Edward had said about them. They can't be together, but can't let go. Almost like they're stuck in this fucked up limbo. My heart shattered into a million pieces just thinking about the tragedy of their situation.

"What's on your mind…" Esme said.

I blinked and turned towards her. I noticed Alice had gone down by the boat and was talking to Jasper. We were alone. And she knew my head was a cluttered mess.

"Lots of things," I mumbled. "It's really sad."

"Rose and Emmett?" She nodded. "I hate the pain they're going through, but I can't say that I don't understand Rose's decision. This life is tough, kid. It's not fair all the time, especially to the ones that get left behind."

"Alice said she doesn't mind."

"Rose isn't Alice. The truth is some people can handle it and some can't." She patted my back and went down to join the boys. I eventually followed and stood silently at the back of the group.

Edward wiped his hands off and started towards me. "You okay?"

"No." I put my arms around him. "I already miss you and you haven't left yet."

He smiled and reached down to pick me up. I wrapped my legs around his waist, holding my body close to him. "I'll be back soon." He nuzzled into my neck.

"Boys!" Captain shouted. "Let's roll." He kissed Esme and stepped onto the boat. Jasper hugged Alice one last time before joining him.

"Be careful okay? Promise me," I whispered.

"Promise me you'll be here when I get back," he said, squeezing me tighter.

It was a promise I knew we'd make a thousand times. He'd be careful. I'd be here. Seemed like a simple request, but I had a feeling it wasn't on either end. This job was probably a lot more dangerous than he let on and the way he refused to let me go made me think he knew how hard it could be to just be here.

He pulled back and leaned down to kiss me as Captain yelled for him again. I grabbed his chin, holding his face to mine a moment longer before he broke away. I felt the tears prickle behind my eyes as I watched him walk away from me. He stepped onto the boat just as it was pulling away from the dock.

Alice put her arm around my shoulder as the boat floated out into the water. Edward looked back and smiled as it started towards the lighthouse and out to sea.

"The first time is the hardest," she said. "They'll be back soon."

"Come girls!" Esme yelled. "We've got a bar to clean!"

We spent the rest of the day cleaning the bar from front to back. I headed back to my house to relax and shower. I headed back into town and was thankful to start my shift. I already decided I hated him being gone. I just felt off.

I dropped five bottles and messed up more than a few drinks that night. I thought Esme was going to fire me, but she just told me "buck up" and get back to work. Thank goodness she understood. Or her version of understanding.

I was in a sour mood by the time the bar closed even though I made a fortune in tips. Esme told me I could stay in Edward's apartment if I wanted to, but I just wanted to be alone. Mostly because I knew the tears were coming from the stress of today and I didn't want to cry in front of Esme. I had a feeling that woman never shed a tear in her life.

I packed up my stuff and headed back to my truck. I was about to jump in when I noticed something on my windshield. An envelope was placed underneath my wiper blade.

My brow furrowed in confusion as I pulled it out and peeked inside. I pulled out a few light pieces of paper and squinted, trying to see in the dim glow of the streetlight.

My heart stopped.

"Holy shit."

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><p><strong>AN: The next chapter is the big reveal or at least you'll know exactly what happened to Edward. He'll get a chance to speak for himself eventually as well.**

**Thanks for indulging me in this small break this weekend. I had Halloween shenanigans to get into. :)**


	14. Chapter 14

_**A/N: This chapter contains discussion of sensitive subject matter.**_

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><p><em>Local Woman Dies After Fall from Lighthouse<em>

_The body of a local woman, Jane Volturi, 21, was found at the base of the lighthouse early yesterday morning after she was reported missing by her mother. She was declared dead at the scene._

_The woman's fiancé, local fisherman Edward Cullen, was out at sea when the tragedy occurred. It is unknown at this time whether Miss Volturi's fall was accidental or intentional, but authorities are investigating and plan to release more details later today. _

I flipped to the next one. An obituary.

_Jane Volturi, 21_

_Jane Volturi passed away on Wednesday, May 11th at the age of 21. _

_Jane was born on February 3rd, 1985 to parents Caius and Renetta Volturi. She attended Hilltop High School, where she participated in Cheerleading and was a frequent member of the Honor Roll. After high school, Jane began work at her family's local hardware store and became engaged to high school sweetheart Edward Cullen. Jane loved her dog Zeus, dancing and spending time with her family and friends._

_She is survived by her parents, Caius and Renetta Volturi. Fiancé Edward Cullen, Uncles Aro and Marcus Volturi, and many cousins and friends. She is predeceased by her grandparents and child._

_Funeral services will be held this Saturday at Hilltop Cemetery at 11 am. In lieu of flowers, the family asks for donations to be sent to the Humane Society. _

I steadied myself against my truck as the tears slipped from my eyes.

_ Volturi's Death Ruled a Suicide_

_Authorities have released more information regarding the recent death of Jane Volturi, the young woman found last week at the lighthouse._

_ After further investigation and several interviews with family and friends, they have determined that Volturi climbed to the top of the lighthouse and jumped to her death on the rocks below. _

_ Sources say that Volturi had recently miscarried and was suffering intense depression in its wake. Funeral services were held last weekend at Hilltop Cemetery. Fiancé Edward Cullen could not be reached for comment. _

I buried my head in my hands as I tried to process everything. Engagements. Babies. Death. It didn't make sense. It made perfect sense.

The next thing I knew my feet were carrying me back to the bar, up the stairs to Esme's apartment. I pounded my fists hard against her door, barely able to see through my tears. I didn't care about how she saw me anymore.

"Hold your horses," she sighed from behind the door. It cracked open slowly and she froze as she took in my expression. "Honey, what's happened? What's wrong?" She stepped outside and took my face in her hands. All I could do was cry. I couldn't speak. I couldn't breathe. I could barely hand her the newspaper clippings.

"Oh dear Lord," she breathed. "Come inside. Come on." She put her arm around me and pulled me inside.

She sat me down at their small dining room table and threw a tea kettle on the stove. We waited in silence until the scream of the steam pierced through the room. She poured two cups and sat down at the table with me.

"I knew you'd find out eventually, but I was hoping he'd finally be able to tell you," she said, handing me my tea. She looked at me expectantly. "Well I know you have questions, child."

"I…I just don't…." I shook my head. "I never imagined…" I couldn't form a coherent thought or sentence. I had so many questions. So many.

"Nobody did. Jane was the town sweetheart. Everyone knew or, knew her parents. And my Edward loved her." She smiled.

I thought it would hurt me to hear about Edward with someone else, but surprisingly it didn't. I just felt sad for him.

"When they found out about the baby, he immediately proposed. People eventually started talking, especially when she started to show. Man, she had the cutest baby bump." Esme laughed. "They adored that child. Edward couldn't wait to be a father. It scared the shit out of him, but once it became his reality, it was all he wanted."

"What happened?"

"The boys had just left port a few days before." She cleared her throat. "Jane's mother called me in a panic, said there had been some…bleeding. And that they were up at the hospital. Alice and I went up there. And we waited and waited for them to tell us something." She stared at the table, looking as sad and distraught as I'd ever seen her. "When they told us she'd lost the baby I…" She shook her head. "I didn't know what to do. I didn't know how to tell him." She put her hand up to her mouth and swallowed hard. "We radioed the boat, just telling them to get back to shore as soon as possible. I didn't want him traveling back here knowing what had happened."

I wiped at my eyes, knowing the pain that was about to come, knowing how much this hurt him.

"Jane was released from the hospital a few days later. She didn't speak one word. Not one," she said. "Her mother took her home that night and we planned on stopping by the next morning. Instead we got a call at six in the morning asking if Jane was with us." She sniffled. "They found her body out at the lighthouse, still in her nightgown."

"The lady in white," I whispered.

"Every place has got a lady in white, Bella. They took my son's tragedy and made it into a ghost story that haunts him everyday."

I felt sick just thinking of the way his entire life had been smashed into pieces. He'd lost his child and fiancée without even knowing. I could see his face, coming into port expecting to see her smiling at the dock waiting for him. I saw Esme telling him, saw how angry and hurt he was. And even though I was playing back these memories that didn't belong to me, I felt like his story was an integral part of my story now. His loss was my loss. Part of me wondered if he could ever be whole again.

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><p><strong>AN: Again, Bella and Edward will talk more about what happened to him.**

**I'm hoping to do some marathon writing and try, emphasis on the try, to get this story finished up in a few days. I'm participating in NaNoWriMo (which for those of you who asked, it's National Write a Novel Month) and starting November 1st I'll be challenging myself to write my first original novel during the month of November. **

**Thank you for all of your kind words about this story. It means so much!**


	15. Chapter 15

I spent a lot of time with Esme while the boys were gone. She didn't question my behavior or how I was feeling about the revelation. She just heated us up some tea and let me cry or ask questions. She wanted to leave some of it for Edward to explain, which I understood. I wanted to talk to him about it, but it scared me at the same time. It was starting to make me feel a little conflicted about their impending return.

The night before they were set to return, I slept at Edward's place. I would have thought staying at my own place would help me relax a little, but it didn't. I missed his smell.

There was a knock on the door in the middle of the night and Esme popped her head in.

"You asleep, honey?" She whispered.

"No." I sighed. "I'm too nervous." I rolled over and sat up. "What if I say the wrong thing? What if I can't face him?"

She stepped inside and sat down on the edge of the bed. "I don't want you to worry about that. Edward wants to talk to you. He's just as clueless as you on how to handle this. It's a hard situation."

"What if I'm just a replacement? A second best because he's still in love with her?"

"I ought to slap the shit out of you for saying something so ridiculous," she huffed and lay down beside me. "Bella, when you lose someone you love so suddenly and tragically that pain is never going to fully go away. He loves Jane. He's always going to love Jane in some way. They were engaged and having a child, there's no way to just erase that connection. But that doesn't mean he can't love you with everything he has. Our past is part of us, regardless of if it's in our future. You can't hold that against him, sweetheart. I know it was a different situation, but you've lost someone close to you. You know what it's like."

I did know what it was like to lose someone. I tried to compare our situations the best that I could. If my dad ever remarried, I couldn't see myself not loving that person unless she was a heinous bitch. But that didn't mean that I wouldn't love my mom any less. I knew it was a different kind of love, but love is love.

"He's going to kill me for telling you this," Esme said with a laugh. "He came to me the first night you were here…the night he closed with you. And he sad 'Mom, I have a problem.' So I sat him down, thinking it was going to be something that happened on the boat or Emmett was a jackass or something." She looked at me and smiled. "He said… 'Mom, I felt something. Tonight with Bella.' So I asked him what the problem was with that and he asked me if that meant he was betraying Jane's memory?" She ran her fingers through her hair. "And if you could have seen the sheer….confusion in his eyes…." She turned towards me. "You were his first after her. Women threw themselves at him in these years since her death and he hasn't even glanced their way. He was always polite, but ever since then it's like he's put his guard up. Somehow, someway you tore that down. Don't ever doubt that connection, Bella. Don't doubt my son." She sucked her lip between her teeth.

"I won't," I whispered.

The next morning I woke up calmer than I expected. Maybe because I'd slept the entire day away. I threw my hair up into a ponytail as I walked towards the window. It looked out over the docks and towards the lighthouse so I could see when they were coming in. And it just so happened that their boat was ambling towards the dock just then.

I smiled and felt my heart beat faster as I raced across the floor and barreled down the stairs, not bothering to put any shoes on. I cursed as soon as I got outside and started stepping on the various rocks and pebbles on the road.

The boat had barely reached the dock as I rounded the corner and started down the aisle to their spot. My eyes danced over the boat, just aching for a look at him.

"Tie down that cage, Jazz!"

The sound of his voice brought tears to my eyes. I finally saw him step out onto the front of the boat and throw the rope towards the dock. He pointed and shouted some things back into the cabin of the boat before finally turning towards me.

"Hey pretty girl." He sighed, his shoulders noticeably heaving up and down. He smirked and took one large step onto the dock as he threw his arms around me.

I buried myself into his neck and cried. Seeing him after knowing was so much more intense than I ever imagined it would be. I felt so attuned, so connected to him in a way that I never thought was possible. Almost like our hearts were beating through our chests only for one another, in a strange, complicated, perfect dance.

"I missed you," I whispered.

"I missed you too," he laughed. He spun me around as I wrapped my legs around his waist. "What the hell are you doing out here without any shoes on?"

"I couldn't wait to see you." I snuggled into his chest, showing no signs of getting down anytime soon.

"Alright then." He turned back to the boat. "I'll be right back!"

He giggled and walked us up the dock, towards the bar as his hands held me close to his body. My fingers found their way to his face, caressing up and down the thick hair that was covering his face now. My Sasquatch was home.

He carried me into the bar and kissed Esme before continuing upstairs. As soon as the door closed, his lips were on mine. Hungry. Starving. Ravenous.

He pressed me up against the door and nuzzled my neck, nipping and sucking at my skin. "God, I missed you," he mumbled. I laughed a little when his beard tickled, but found myself absolutely craving his attention. He reached down and fingered along my attire. "Wearing my shirt and my boxers…"

"I missed the way you smelled."

"Well you smell a lot better than a boat of dirty men and fish." His hand lingered dangerously close to the waistband of his boxers at my hips. He bit his lip and growled. "Do you have any idea what it's like to be out there, knowing that you're here…wanting you so bad."

I cocked my eyebrow. This was pretty bold for him. I knew that they said absence made the heart grow fonder, but did it also make the sexual frustration unbareable. The almost excruciating buzz coursing through my body told me yes.

His hand slipped between the fabric and my skin and traveled south. I arched my body towards his and hissed when he brushed against me. He smirked and shook his head, almost like he'd just been let in on a secret.

"Edward!" Emmett yelled from outside. "If you don't get your ass out here and help us unload this boat, I'm gonna beat it!"

"Fuck off!" Edward screamed out the open window.

"Fine. I'm telling Captain!"

If I would have been able to form a coherent thought with Edward Cullen's hand down my underwear, I probably would have laughed imagining Emmett stalking off like a kid on the playground.

"I don't want you to get in trouble," I whimpered.

"I'm already in trouble." He leaned forward and kissed me. "Big, big trouble."

"Edward!" Captain yelled up, half mumbled because he probably had a cigar stationed between his lips. "Damn it get down here or I'm docking your pay, boy!"

Edward was silent. I shook my head. He wasn't losing money for me.

I struggled away from him and ran to the window with him chasing after me the whole time.

"He'll be right down, Captain!" I yelled.

"Thank you, young lady."

"What are you doing later?"

"That depends on what you're doing." I grabbed his shirt.

"I have some things to take care of, but I can come over later tonight."

"Okay." I smiled and kissed him. "Go unload your boat."

He turned and jogged back downstairs. I looked out the window and watched him run down to the dock.

Esme actually closed the bar for the night, which apparently happened every now and then when she needed a little…alone time with Captain.

I went home and waited for Edward to take care of his business. I assumed that he had some things to stock up and take care of with the boat, but as 9 o'clock rolled around without a word, I started to get worried.

I put on a sweater and stepped outside to head downtown and see what was up. As soon as I stepped out onto my porch, I saw it. The lighthouse was on. And I knew exactly where I was headed.

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><p><strong>AN: Eek! It's the big moment!**

**Probably only 3 or so more chapters to go : )**


	16. Chapter 16

I sped down to the dock and parked my truck where I shouldn't have. I was thankful that everyone seemed to trust people in this town with their things because there were at least four small rowboats just tied up to the dock. I climbed into the first one I came to and started rowing out to the lighthouse.

I struggled for a while against the waves, but I eventually fought the wind and water to make it to the lighthouse. His boat was tied up at the small dock there so I did the same and cautiously looked up at the towering form in front of me. The light was intensely bright, swirling around reflecting off the ocean and the land.

This was the first time I'd seen the lighthouse up close. It was beautiful, in a broken down kind of way.

A small set of stairs led to what looked like the entrance. I hugged my arms around myself and climbed up them. The door creaked as I forced it open, slicing through the silence inside. There was a small hallway that led to some other doors, but my eyes were fixed on the staircase in front of me.

I took it step by step trying to prepare myself for what I was about to do. I hated to say I didn't really think about his reaction. Part of me didn't even care about talking about Jane right now. I just had to get to him. I didn't want him to hurt anymore. I didn't want him to isolate himself out here just to drown in his pain.

My legs shook as I reached the top. It brought me to a landing about halfway up the lighthouse and another set of winding stairs, curling around up to the top. I took them two at a time and came to a small hatch door in the ceiling, slightly open.

I took a deep breath and forced my palm against the cold metal. It moved fairly easily, squeaking against its rust. I climbed the last few steps and found myself enclosed in the watch room with the large light and the shadow of a man hunched down on the ground.

I held my hand up to shield myself from the blinding light as it spun around, highlighting Edward's slightly shaven face and plaid blanket that hung loosely around his shoulders. The glint and glimmer of his tears reflected off his skin in streaks down his cheeks.

He glanced up at me and I froze. One look. It was all it took. He knew that I knew. I couldn't explain how he knew, but he did.

He buried his head in his hands and started sobbing as he leaned forward against his knees.

I gasped and rushed to him, pulling his hands slowly away from his face and replacing them with my own as I kissed his cheeks.

"Why do you still come up here, sweetheart?" I whispered.

"I don't know. I…I don't want any sailors to get lost out there. I want them to have something to guide them home…"

Would that have made a difference? Does Edward blame the closed down lighthouse for not getting back in time to save her? I wanted to tell him that nothing could have saved her. That it wasn't his fault that he wasn't here. She was too far gone to convince her otherwise.

I leaned my forehead against his and crawled onto his lap. "And what guides you home, Edward?"

"You do," he mumbled, kissing my cheek. "I was just…saying goodbye."

"You don't have to…" I shook my head and trailed. "I know that she's always going to be a part of you."

"Yes I do." He put his arms around me, enveloping me in his blanket. "Because I'm falling in love with you."

A tear slipped down my cheek as I leaned forward to kiss him. He sniffled as his hands moved to my lower back, pulling my body close against his. I shivered as he slipped his fingers under my shirt and rested them against my bare skin.

I felt passion. I felt lust and love and desire. I felt everything.

I moaned and slid closer to him as he quickly undid the clasp to my bra. His lips trailed down my throat and over my shoulder as he pushed my sweater off one shoulder to expose the skin there.

I ran my fingers through his hair as he tasted me and arched my neck back to give him more. He fumbled with the button on my jeans. I pulled back and stood, just enough to push them down before I captured his lips in mine again. I crawled over him, reaching for the top of his pants as I went. I undid the button and pulled down the zipper as he forced his hips up so he could pull them down just enough.

The hem of my sweater fell to the middle of my thighs as I straddled him. He kissed me again as he turned, laying the blanket down before he laid back flat against the floor himself. I hovered above him, longing to feel the heat between us.

As I sank down onto him, we both cried out and he immediately shot upright, grasping me almost too tightly. A strangled moan barely escaped his lips as he his hands gravitated from my back to my legs before slipping beneath my sweater. He grabbed hold of my hips and started guiding me as he kissed any inch of me that was exposed.

I rested my arms on his shoulders and closed my eyes as I moved my hips with his, feeling everything I knew I would a thousand times more.

Each time the light flashed over his face, I fell more and more in love with him. It was like every emotion; adoration, curiosity, frustration, tenderness…love, was there. It came crashing down on me then, how much I felt for this man. I didn't care that he was broken or had a past. I wanted to take him in my hands and fix every fracture and break in his fragile soul. I wanted to know that I could help him. I wanted to know that I could love him like he deserved to be loved. I just wanted…him.

I grabbed his hair and tilted his head up to me so I could kiss him. My tongue slipped from my lips between his, allowing me to taste him completely. I whimpered into his mouth as I moved my hips faster against him, desperately wanting to find that friction and release that we were both aching for.

For a moment he pulled away, just to watch me move in front of him. Up and down. Body heat. Sweat in the cold. Grasping fingers against my skin. Dizzying perfection.

I smiled as he buried his face into my chest and cried out in pleasure. My body hummed against his, feeling so in tune that either of us were sure to catch fire from the heat.

He fell back and I collapsed on top of him, kissing his neck and his lips. I refused to let go of him. I wanted him to know that I wasn't going anywhere. I wasn't leaving him. I was here to stay.

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><p><strong>AN: Can I just say I've been waiting to write this chapter since we started? I just love love love the idea of turning something that was such a symbol of pain for him into a thing of hope and real, true new beginnings. It just makes me giddy. Plus he's hot and I want him naked under that plaid blanket. O.o *shrugs***


	17. Chapter 17

Edward and I fell asleep in the lighthouse and rowed back to shore early the next morning. When we reached land, he tied up the boats and put his arm around my shoulder as we hobbled back to The Wharf still half asleep.

We immediately went back to bed, curling up together underneath his raggedy old blanket. I didn't wake up again until late that afternoon. My whole body felt exhausted, satisfied. It ached in the best possible way.

I stretched and rolled over to find Edward cuddled up beside me in the fetal position. I didn't dare wake him up. I couldn't imagine how exhausting last night must have been for him emotionally.

I watched him sleep for another hour before his eyes fluttered open. He offered me a small smile and yawned.

"Good morning…" he mumbled.

"Good afternoon." I cocked my eyebrow and grinned.

"Shit!" He shot up. "I have work to do. I should have been out at the dock hours ago."

"I have a feeling if they needed you, we would have heard it." I reached for him and pulled him back down. He sighed and finally relaxed back into the bed. Even though he'd just slept the day away, he looked tired. I figured this was the first time in a long time where he had nothing to do, no obligations, no charades to keep up. He could just be Edward.

"Hey, are you okay?" I asked.

"Yeah. Just…a little overwhelmed." His eyes shot to me. "In a good way."

"Oh." I blushed. "Good."

"Thank you. For coming after me last night. I knew you would eventually and I can't say that it didn't terrify me, but I needed you." He took my face in his hands. "I needed you so much."

"I'm sorry it took me so long."

"That wasn't your fault. That was mine." He looked away like he was ashamed.

"You don't have to be embarrassed that you were still hurting, Edward."

"It wasn't even that I was still hurting. I mean I still feel the pain of losing her. And losing my child. But that doesn't even…compare to the guilt. I should have been home."

"You trying to provide a life for your family."

"I just…it's been hard for me to be here…since they died. I'm always eager to go out again. I welcomed the solitude that the ocean brought me because I didn't have this…weight on me."

"And now?"

"The way things are now scared me at first, Bella. I never really had something to come home to. I mean I love my mom, but there wasn't anything holding me here." He brushed the hair away from my face. "Now, it's like gravity pulls me back. It's something I've never experienced. Not even with Jane."

"I don't want you to think that you can't like…talk about her. Or miss her. Because I understand."

I really did. This damn town made it so easy for him to hide away and never face what he was feeling because nobody refused to fucking talk about it. I wanted him to talk about it. I wanted him to talk about her and how he feels and what he's going through. Because it's the only way he's going to truly get past it.

"How did you find out?" He finally asked.

"Someone left newspaper clippings on my car. I suspect the librarian." I cocked my eyebrow.

"With the candlestick in the lounge?" He smiled a little, but it didn't stay long. "I'm a horrible person." He closed his eyes.

"Why?"

"I didn't want her to die. It was the last thing I would have ever wanted. But after meeting you, knowing you….loving you. I wouldn't change it if I could."

"That doesn't make you a horrible person," I whispered. "You…loved her, Edward. And I mean no offense to her, but she couldn't love you enough. That doesn't make her a bad person or mean she didn't try she just…" I sniffled, trying to hold back the tears. "The pain crushed her love for you. It was nobody's fault. It was just the way it was."

He rubbed his hands over his face and sighed. He held his hands over his eyes for a long time, until I realized he was crying.

"Edward…" I put my hands over his.

"I would have been a good dad," he cried. "I would have been a really good dad."

I kissed his cheek and settled onto his chest while he cried. I knew there was nothing I could do or say to make it better so I just laid with him.

He eventually fell back asleep and I cat napped until I couldn't anymore. I woke up around two a.m. to a silent bar downstairs. I kissed him and headed downstairs to move around a bit. My body was starting to ache from lying in bed all day.

I stretched as I walked into the bar and jumped when I saw Esme mopping the floor.

"Oh!" I gasped.

"Hi, Honey." She looked up. "How was your day?"

"I'm so sorry I didn't come to work. It was just…"

"My son needed you. It's alright." She smiled. "I guess I won't fire you just yet." She stopped mopping and set the mop against the bar. "How is he?"

I shrugged.

"At least you got him talking about it." She sighed and shook her head. "He wouldn't even talk to Emmett and those two have been best friends since Edward was born."

"I didn't really do anything…"

"You did. You were you. Sometimes it just takes that one person to make it all different. You were the one."

I smiled and pulled myself up onto a barstool. I found myself staring out the window, looking at the dark shadow out in the water where the lighthouse stood.

"It really is a beautiful lighthouse…" I mumbled.

"I know. It's a shame there's no one here to run it. I would but I'm too busy with the bar. Captain's up to his knees in lobster and the boys work their asses off. There's no one." She frowned. "I figure someday we'll be forced to sell it or demolish it. Can't say I look forward to that. Edward's not gonna like it. Even with all the evil that happened out there, it's his favorite place, means a lot to him."

I stared at the lighthouse for a long time, debating what I already knew I was going to do. It seemed like the obvious answer. I came here with no direction, no guide, and no map to how my life was supposed to turn out. Maybe the lighthouse had done its job after all. It brought me home.

"Esme?" I mumbled. "You were wrong."

"About what, sweetheart?"

"About no one being able to…" I trailed off and shook my head. "There's one person….that could run the lighthouse."

"Who?"

I stood up and walked to the window. "Me."

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><p><strong>AN: Duh, Bella. Geez.**

**So sorry about the lack of updates yesterday. I've been so busy and so behind on The Roommate, I had to make that my priority the past few days. That being said, those reading that story will be happy to know the new chapter is with my prereader!**

**Thank you all for your kind words of support. I can never say that enough. So thank you.**


	18. Chapter 18

I didn't want to tell Edward about my plan yet, just in case it couldn't happen. After I spoke with Esme a little more, I got dressed and headed down to the Chamber of Commerce to talk to them about what I need to do training wise. They informed me that I had to learn how to work the machinery, which was a give in. I also had to be certified in CPR and register with the Lighthouse Association.

Over the next few days, I begged Edward to take me up to the lighthouse to show me how to do everything. He thought I was just curious, but by the third day, he'd become suspicious.

"Why do you wanna know all this anyway?" He asked, flicking on the light.

"I have my reasons." I wrapped my arms around his waist. "How are you doing?"

"Better." He sighed and kissed the top of my head. "I never thought that talking about it would make it better, but it did."

He'd been a lot more open about talking about Jane, but the baby was another issue. He hadn't spoken a word about it since that first morning. As much as he loved Jane, I think the baby was the piece of the puzzle that broke him completely. And I couldn't blame him. He left a pregnant fiancé and came home to attend two funerals. It was more than any person should have to take. I knew we had a long way to go, but he was truly on the right path to redemption and forgiveness. He had to forgive himself.

After a week or two, I was feeling really comfortable with the run of the lighthouse. Esme had been great about giving me time to learn. I'd been taking CPR classes during the day and received my certification yesterday. She helped me research the Lighthouse Association and figure out exactly what I needed to submit to them.

Another week passed and the boys were getting ready to ship out again. It was like a cycle, the same type of work building up to it. The same aching heart, just anticipating his absence. I thought maybe this time it would be easier, but I had a feeling it would be just as hard.

The day before he left, I received my certification from the Lighthouse Association that I was finally registered. Esme asked me if I preferred staying out in the apartment at the lighthouse or if I wanted to keep my house. I guess I'd never really thought about it, but I couldn't even think about selling my mom's house. It wasn't even an option. I figured I'd set up a small apartment out there when I needed it and keep the house as my real home.

I snuck out of work early that night and grabbed Edward for a boat ride. We circled around the lighthouse before docking and heading up the stairs to the top. I could feel the certification eating a hole in my back pocket. I was anxious to tell him. I hoped he'd be happy, but there was a small part of me that was a little nervous about his reaction. What if he hated me for doing this? What if he thought it was too much?

I leaned against the window, smiling as I looked back out over the sea. I tried to imagine all the different nights I'd see out here. Calm. Rough. Fog. Storm. Perfect sunsets. I'd see it all. And I'd be the last and first thing he'd see.

"I have something to tell you," I whispered as he wrapped his arms around me.

"What is it?" He mumbled, kissing my neck.

"Look in my back pocket."

He smirked and slithered his hand down over my ass. He stuck his fingers into my back pocket and grabbed the piece of paper.

"What's this?" He laughed.

"Read it." I shrugged and played dumb.

He moved beside me and leaned back against the window. He slowly opened up the folded piece of paper and I held my breath.

"Bella, what is this?" He asked, his tone sharp. "I don't understand."

"I'm taking over the lighthouse," I said softly. "I took the classes and got certified…" I was hesitant now. I couldn't judge his reaction. "And I talked to Esme and she thought it would be a good idea."

He pinched the bridge of his nose and my heart stopped. Did I mess up?

"I just uh…" I leaned my head forward and rested it on his shoulder. "You said I guided you back home. I just wanted…I wanted to show you that I'd always be here to do that."

"This is just…" He shook his head and I felt a tear slip from his cheek to mine. "This is the most beautiful….fucking amazing thing anyone has ever done for me."

I smiled. I did the right thing.

"Have I told you how much I love you?" He whispered, nuzzling into my hair.

"Not since this morning. But I don't mind hearing it again." I turned and popped up on my toes to kiss him. His beard was a little longer than usual and it tickled against my skin. "And I love you too."

I slept at Edward's that night and slipped out early in the morning after I kissed him goodbye. I rowed out to the lighthouse and climbed up to the top. I brought a blanket, binoculars, and a chair and set it to the side as I waited. I could see the boys at the dock, preparing for their trip. Edward kept looking up towards the lighthouse, shielding his eyes against the freshly risen sun.

The boat eventually puttered away from the dock and started towards me. I opened the door and walked out onto the galley, wrapping the blanket around my arms as I went. The boat slowed as it approached and Captain blew the horn up at me.

Edward was standing out on the deck, leaning forward over the rail as he smirked up at me. He offered me a small wave and blew me a kiss as they passed. I waved back and watched them move farther and farther away, getting smaller as they inched towards the horizon. I understood what Alice meant now, about being second to the waves. Edward loved the sea unconditionally and irrevocably. I would never want to take that away from him, but I was enamored to be a part of it. Everyone said the sea is unpredictable and unforgiving, but I choose to differ. It's constant and unwavering. And it's always there. Just like I will be.

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><p><strong>AN: **

**Disclaimer: This chapter includes a loose interpretation of what it takes to be a lighthousekeeper. There are several different requirements depending on where you are, and most of them are computer run now. I had to tailor it to Bella for obvious reasons : )**

**This was the last real chapter. There will be an epilogue!**

**Thanks so much for all of your support and kind words for this story. I appreciate all of you so much!**


	19. Epilogue

I was excited today. Today was a good day. Today, Edward was coming home.

I didn't even complain when my alarm went off at the ass-crack of dawn. I quickly shut it off and shuffled out of bed to the small room beside me.

"Masen," I called.

The little body began to squirm in his bed before his tiny head popped up.

"Is it today, Mommy?" He squeaked.

I nodded and smiled.

"Yay!" He threw his covers off and stumbled towards me, screaming in delight.

I scooped him up into my arms and started towards the stairs, laughing at his excitement. It was like Christmas morning every time Edward came home.

"When, Mommy?" He barely sat still long enough for us to reach the top of the lighthouse. I set him down and grabbed his hand as we started out onto the balcony.

The sun was just starting to come up over the horizon and I could see the little dot out on the sea. I smiled. It was them.

"Mommy!" Masen whined. "When?"

"Soon, sweetheart."

I held tightly onto his hand, our one rule for him being up here. Edward had installed enough guards that it was almost impossible for him to fall off the edge, but I was still paranoid. I can honestly say it was probably the first time someone had to baby proof a lighthouse.

"I can't see."

I leaned down and picked him up as we waited for the boat to get closer. I leaned back against the side of the lighthouse and smiled.

We watched as the small dot out in the ocean got bigger and bigger. Until we could finally tell it was a boat.

"Is Captain dere?" He asked, pointing out to the boat. I nodded, still finding it hilarious that he called Captain, Captain. I mean he was his grandfather.

"Yes." I nodded.

"And Uncie Emmett?"

"Yes Uncle Emmett and Uncle Jasper are there too."

"Dey catch da wobster?" His eyes got big. "Da big ones!"

"The biggest."

"Dey do." He hummed and sang to himself. "Dey catch da biggest wobster." After a few minutes of conversing with himself, he turned to me. "Mommy?"

"Yes, child."

"When's da baby coming?"

"Not for a while, sweetheart."

"Befoh Christmas?"

I shook my head. "Not before Christmas. Before you turn four, your sister will be here."

"I be da big broder."

"Yes you will." I leaned down and kissed his forehead. He went back singing to himself. A few minutes later, he turned towards me again.

"Mommy?"

"Yes, Masen," I sighed.

"I wuv you, Mommy."

"I love you too."

The beep-beep of the boat horn caught my attention and I realized that they were close.

I pointed out to the boat as it passed below us. Edward was on the front deck, waving up to us. His beard was worse this time. Thicker. I'd have to take advantage of that before he shaved it all off.

"There's Daddy!" I said to Masen.

"Daddy!" He screamed.

"Hey, Mace!" Edward yelled up to us. "Hi, Mommy!" He winked at me.

"We'll see you in a few minutes," I called down.

He nodded and went back inside.

Masen and I climbed down from the top and I strapped his lifejacket securely around his little body before we hopped onto our little boat. It was a short ride from there to the dock and we reached it just as they did.

I docked the boat and pulled Masen out onto the dock. The moment his feet hit the wood, he started towards Edward.

"Don't run!" I said, tying up the boat.

I stood back up and started towards them. Everyone was huddled around Masen, even Captain. I'd never seen that man so emotional as when he was around that child. Jake too. There was something about being a Grandpa that melted his hard exterior.

"Excuse me!" I said, pushing through. "Can I see my husband, please?"

"Here!" Edward called, throwing Masen onto his shoulders.

"I'm sorry, Sir. I don't think I know you. You don't look anything like my husband." I tugged at his beard and leaned in for a kiss.

"Don't worry, I won't tell him about that," Edward teased. He kissed my neck. "Or that." He leaned in close to my ear. "Or what I'm going to do to you later tonight," he whispered. "God, I missed you."

I blushed and wrapped my arms around him. "I missed you."

He kissed the top of my head. "We've got a little bit of unloading to do, but why don't you guys go wait up at The Wharf. I think Mom's cooking some breakfast."

"Sounds good." I grabbed Masen from his shoulders and we started up the dock.

"I'm glad Daddy's home, Mommy," Masen said.

"Me too, kiddo."

We met Esme, Alice, Rose and Jake up at The Wharf. Esme was just setting out the plates as we walked in.

"Hey Shorty!" She called to Masen.

"Grandma!" Masen jumped from my arms and went right to Esme. They had a special bond, almost like an unspoken language between them that no one understood, but I didn't care. Watching them together was one of the most beautiful things I'd ever seen.

The boys joined us shortly after and I couldn't get enough of Edward. He couldn't be close enough. I couldn't kiss him enough. And I couldn't love him enough.

I couldn't believe that this was my life. I was married. I was a mother. I was the lighthouse keeper. And my husband was the best damn lobsterman on the East Coast.

Despite everything we went through and what Edward had to endure to get here, this made it all better. We were here. We were alive and happy, not just getting through like we were before. That lighthouse might have ended Jane's life. And I wished everyday that I could take away the pain that it caused him. But it also gave us hope. It gave us love. And most of all, it guided him home to me. I couldn't ask for anything more.

"So Bella…" Esme said, once it started to reach dinner time. "How's about coming back for a one night engagement?" She threw a towel my way and nodded towards the bar.

"I'm pregnant, Esme. I can't be a bartender." I laughed and threw the towel back at her.

"Aw come on, babe," Edward pleaded. "For old times' sake."

I fought a smile and sauntered over to pull the towel off. "Well come on then," I said with a smirk. "We've got work to do."

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><p><strong>AN: And that's it! He got his woman and babies! : )**

**Thank you so much again for reading and if you're not reading The Roommate, I hope you'll go check it out. That will be finishing up soon so I can concentrate on my NaNoWriMo Novel! You are all amazing, so thank you for the support and your reviews.**

**So...The End ;)**


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